Slightly Paranormal, Stiles and Lydia Married
by BlodreinaBeauty
Summary: Stiles and Lydia are married. They get into a car accident with the other members of the pack. Lydia is in a coma. What will it take to wake her up? How will Stiles take this? Will Scott be able to save her? What happens to Malia? Find out. I do not own anything. All Stydia! Takes place years after the finale when they are grown and have children. Now Complete!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Back to the Start

Lydia

"Did you know that I have learned every single bone in every single animals body and I can't figure out what is wrong with this one?" Scott asks, while sitting in the back of Roscoe. I lean my hand over the counsel to intertwine my fingers with Stiles'. He smiles over at me for a brief second before looking back to the road.

"Do you have to know zebra too?" Stiles asks.

"Yeah man, but they are similar to horses."

"I have to know every paint color," I say with a smile.

"Yeah and you took AP Calculus IV," Stiles says, rolling his eyes.

"I didn't even know that was a class," Kira says.

"Me either until I took it," I admit.

I decided to double major in Biomathematics and Interior Design. I did pretty well in both. Stiles' vision worked out almost as well as he wanted it too. Of course there were a few bumps in the road, some drilling into my head and there was that awkward first date but it was all okay in the end. Malia figured it out like we all knew she would. She found out she's really interested in people and their interactions so she was a phycology major. It helped her avoid math as much as possible and it has good hope for a nice job as a counselor of some sort.

Of course we all lived together. It was a three bedroom so was kind of expensive but there were five of us so we make it work. Stiles and I moved in together when we were in college. All five of us lived together. It was complicated but we made it work. We started dating then and we only got stronger. There were other complicated things that happened but of course, that is how it goes with the supernatural world. Long story.

Stiles studied a lot but he's really good at what he does. Natural, actually. He's going to be a detective eventually. Even though Scott thought he wasn't smart enough it turns out that he is smart enough. He spent hours working but he is a very good Vet now. It's what he has always wanted. I think the reason we are all able to work so hard is because we are around people that love us. When Stiles is too stressed out or Malia is working too hard we shut them up and take them out. It's nice to live with people that you know when you go off to college. Of course that doesn't mean we haven't met knew people, or knew problems that came with them. That's another story entirely.

"Whose party even is this?" Scott asks.

"Dude! Why are you sucking the fun out of my evening! Let me dance with my wife at some random party, please!" Stiles shouts as he looks in the review mirror at Scott. He just shrugs and throws his hands up.

"Can't you do that where we know people?"

"No. You know I have social anxiety."

"And you think people you don't know will make it better?" Scott asks.

"All right! You got me!" Stiles throws his hands up and rolls his eyes. I thought I heard-

 _Watch out! Watch out!_

Something screams in my head. I jump and look around for what it is for. I have tried to stop ignoring them or being afraid of the voices. I have to accept them and try to figure out their purpose. I have learned that they always have a purpose. It sounded like my voice. Why did it sound like my voice? Why would I be yelling that?

"Doesn't that sound great babe?" Stiles asks. I have no idea what he is talking about. I shake my head so I can try to listen to him. He looks at me with concern and puts his free hand on my knee.

"Lydia? Are you okay?" he asks.

"Yeah I'm fine. I zoned out for a second there. What were you saying?" I ask, feeling embarrassed. He looks at me like I am fragile as he does that nervous thing where he presses his lips together and blinks a bunch of times before looking away.

"We aren't going to a party," he says.

"Where are we going?" I ask. "I got dressed for a party."

"I know, which is why we are-"

 _Watch out!_

 _Glass shatters and falls along a hard surface, something flips over, the sound of skidding tires and wheels spinning. People are screaming. Someone shouts my name._

"Lydia? What do you hear? I know you aren't listening to me," Stiles says. He has gotten good at figuring it out.

"Sorry."

"What do you hear?" he demands again.

"Glass shattering. Someone yelling," I say.

"Who?"

Scott and Kira both sit up to get closer to me. I try not to feel crowded. I try not to feel pressured. Just let it happen and it'll be fine. Just figure it out, don't push it away because it scares you.

"Me," I say. "It sounds like my voice."

"What are you screaming?"

I see the bright white light come from the front of the jeep.

"Lydia!? What is it?!"

We pull into an intersection. I see Stiles look in front of us as someone runs the light. I can feel it right before it happens.

"Watch out! Watch out!" I scream.

"Whoa! Whoa!" Stiles screams as he tries to avoid the car but he can't.

 _Someone screaming my name._

It's Stiles.

There is nothing he can do as the car hits us and Roscoe falls over onto its side. I hear another shout and then a thud. Something hurts my temple, bad. I hit my head on something. Crinkling and shattering noises rain over us as I feel sharp, stinging sensations all over my body.

 _Glass shatters._

 _Something flips over._

Something skids along the pavement as we are forced through the intersection. Someone else screams something. It sounds like Kira. What is she saying? My head hurts, bad. There's glass in my legs, maybe in my side too. I can't tell. It's hard to stay awake all of the sudden. Everything is starting to hurt. It sounds like pain. I don't hear Stiles anymore. He's out cold, I can feel it.

 _The sound of skidding tires and wheels spinning_ as someone runs into us from the other lane. We are forced backwards, still on the left side of the jeep.

 _People are screaming._

Then I can't hear Scott's voice anymore. Is he out? Is he okay? I shout when I feel something hit us hard. My head smacks into something and I know I'm fading out. I can't hold on anymore.

Then everything falls black.


	2. Chapter 2

"You have to let me see him," Scott begs.

"I'm sorry I can't. It's family only," the nurse says for the third time. Kira holds onto Scott's arm as they stand by the front desk. I step back and watch the scene unfold.

We've been here for forty minutes.

"Can I least have an update on his status?" Scott asks.

"I am only supposed to tell family that."

"His only family are two children under five years old and his wife who is lying in the other room, dying!" Scott shouts suddenly. It's 11:32 when I look at the clock.

"You were also in the car with Mr. Stilinski is that correct?" she asks.

"Yes! I am like his brother! Just tell me!"

"He's unconscious because we are keeping him that way while he heals. We just finished removing the glass from his body. There was an extensive amount. He has six very broken ribs and a broken arm and elbow. He is currently being prepped for surgery to remove bone fragments that are floating towards his lungs. He also has a mild concussion. We expected it to be worse than it was."

"Will he survive?" Scott asks in a chocked voice. I see Kira squeeze his hand. The nurse looks at him with her lips pulled together as if gathering her thoughts.

"We can't say that is one hundred percent," she says.

"Than what percentage can you give me?"

She sighs.

"Fifty, fifty."

"Oh god," he mumbles and turns away from the nurse. I watch Scott stock outside before anyone can see his reaction. His claws start to come out before the door closes behind him. I want to run after him when I hear Kira ask about me.

"You were also in the accident?" she asks.

"Yes ma'am."

"Lydia is currently in a self induced coma. She lost a lot of blood, has a severe concussion and broken wrist. She is on a ventilator because she can't breath on her own."

Kira nods but her face crinkles in pain. She thanks the lady before walking outside to find Scott.

He angrily pushed over a tree, whilst full wolf and then fell next to it. Every emotion of the day came crashing on him. He slashed the tree with all he had before he felt Kira touch his shoulder. He grunted and then came the whimpers. The crying and the broken sobs that wracked his body. His claws detract and his shoulders shake badly. Kira grabs him and holds him with an arm around his shoulder. He sobs into her and she holds him as tight as she can. She doesn't tell him it will be okay and he doesn't say anything. They sit like that for a long while. After the first minute I leave. I go back inside to look at who else came because I can feel someone else is here.

I can still feel the pain from Scott outside. I can still hear his wracked sobs, his broken expression. Stiles is his best friend in the whole world. Stiles is the only thing other than his mother that has been the same and has always been there. He can't lose his best friend. He just can't do that. It would kill him. It is killing him. I can feel it. I can feel part of him falling away, actually being crushed by the news that part of him might not make it.

Once inside I find Malia is sitting in the waiting room, legs crossed over each other, making a call to the sheriff. She's calling his father. I'm sorry she has to be the one to do it but I'm thankful that she is. Scott can't even speak right now and Kira shouldn't leave him. For a moment I can't believe this is happening. I shouldn't be okay with it but the fact that I might not make it either comforts me for a small moment. I can't feel all of my normal emotions but I can feel an immense sadness wash over me. I don't want him to die. He can't. If I am not going to make it, he has to be alive because he has to raise our children. One of us has to be around for them. I hope they are home asleep right now. I can't have them here. Someone needs to call the babysitter. Someone needs to call Stella and tell her to keep them until the morning.

Scott comes back in, wiping off his red face and holds Kira's hand for stability. Scott stands in front of Malia as she talks to the Sherif. She hangs up and puts the phone down when she sees him. She stands up and pulls him in for a hug. Tears leak from her eyes as she holds him tight to her. Kira puts a hand on her shoulder, not letting go of Scott's other hand. It's a mess. We really made a mess of things. I never realized how much I would effect the people around me if I died. I understand how devastated they would be if Stiles died. I would be incoherent. But not me. I'm not like them. But in moments like these I am reminded of how much I am like them.

Malia pulls away and begins to explain that she called his dad and my mom. They are on their way. His dad is on day shifts only recently so he probably didn't get a call about this. He has been working less now that he is getting older.

"We have to call their babysitter, Stella and tell her to keep the kids," Kira says.

"Speaking of that Kira, I'll call our babysitter and tell her to keep our kid," Scott says.

Kira nods and grabs her phone to call Stella. Malia puts her hand on Kira's shoulder to get her attention.

"I can go get them in the morning if I need to."

Kira nods and begins to talk as the babysitter picks up. She tells her everything. I look around at the people we effected.

The way Malia bites her nails, the way Scott continuously wipes tears from his eyes, the way Kira pushes her pain face away. Then I watch as the Sherif walks in and they have to tell him what happened to his son. He is in surgery now. It's still fifty fifty. The Sherif sits down, holding back emotion as he is so good at doing. I know my kids know nothing about it. It comforts me to know that they are asleep at home in their beds. My mom walks through the door next.

I run over to her and remember she can't see me. I can see her, I can hear her and I can feel her as if I am really here but I am not. At least I am not in the same way that the rest of them are. I sigh when I remember it and hold her hand while the nurses explain everything to her. They don't even know my chances. I'm not even breathing on my own so they aren't good. I guess that is why I can see everything. I guess that is why I feel this rushing feeling so strongly. It's me. I am the one dying this time and I did predict it but I thought it was someone that I loved. I didn't listen to it enough. I didn't listen to it enough. I should have, maybe I could have saved these people the pain but I didn't.

My mom sits down with the Sherif. Malia paces and bites her nails. Kira holds onto Scott as he leans on her. And my children are asleep. So I wonder back to our wing. I walk into his surgery. His face is peaceful, perfectly asleep. His jaw is slightly slack so his mouth is open and they have a tube down his throat. I guess he isn't breathing on his own right now either. They are removing bone fragments but I just want to see his face. I walk over and hold his hand. He's cold. I rub small circles in his hand and lean down to his face.

"What a mess we made, Stiles," I whisper. "What a mess."


	3. Chapter 3

**Lydia's POV. This is because she can hear everyone else in her coma. I see I've got some readers! I would love to hear about what you think! Review please! Yes, as I am sure you are figuring out...Stydia babies are coming soon!**

04:12

It's early morning or really late at night. Either way everyone is starting to fall asleep. Kira eventually convinces Scott that he should go to sleep. After a while his eyes droop and he doesn't have much of a choice. He leans on Kira's shoulder in a chair in the waiting room as he sleeps for a few hours. Kira falls asleep not long after and when Malia finally convinces the Sheriff and Melissa they can rest she is out too. So I walk back towards Stiles's room. He is in recovery and my body is the same place it was before in a coma with a breathing tube and an IV.

Stiles' face is pale, his skin is cold when I touch it. I brush my hands all the way down his arm to his hand. I move his hair from his face. I try not to notice how bad he is bleeding the entire left side of his face is black and blue. He has two bandages on his face as well as a cast on his arm and a wrap under his hospital gown that I can feel through the thin material. I stay close to him, sitting in the chair next to his bed and rest my face on his hand. I wish he could see me. I wish he knew that I was here. I have to talk to him. I have to make him hear me.

"Stiles," I say.

"I need you to be okay for our kids. They have to have at least one of their parents. I don't know how to stay alive or how to wake up so I need you to figure out how because you are the one who always figures it out. You are smarter than the rest of us so you have to figure it out, okay? What are they going to do without both of us? They can't survive without us. I just need you to be okay. Maybe if you're okay it'll be easier for me to wake up because I really don't know what I am doing. There are a lot of people out there that need us. If you don't wake up…I don't know what's going to happen to Scott. Kira will get by but Malia only knows you. She's one of your best friends Stiles. She loves you because you were the only one that befriended her when she came out of being a coyote.

"If you aren't going to wake up for me, at least do it for all of them. Even if I don't make it through this, you have to. I know how hard it will be. I know that you'll want to give up but you can't. I want you to think about us while you are asleep. I've been thinking about us. Our first kiss, our first real date. I'm thinking about it all. When you purposed to me, when you told my mom, when I picked out a wedding dress. I can remember the look on your face when I walked down the isle. I want you to think about our first time as a married couple, our first house, our first baby. And when we decided to name her Ariel Allison. Then we had our second baby and when you found out it was a boy you told me all of the things you were going to do with him. He's still just a baby. You haven't gotten to do any of those things yet. Ariel needs you to walk down the isle and to give her away. You just can't be done yet. Maybe if you're strong enough to come out of it…I will be too."

06:21.

Everyone is awake again but they have circles under their eyes from exhaustion and sadness. Malia drops off coffee for everybody. They sit and drink it slowly as a nurse comes from the hallway and stops in front of the door frame.

"Sheriff Stilinski?" the women asks.

He stands up and gets over there in an instant with the others by his side. Scott and Kira stand right next to him as the nurse looks around at the different members.

"How is he?" Sheriff asks.

"Stiles is currently coming out of anesthesia. It looks like the break on his arm will take weeks but it will heal. His ribs will be another story. The main problem we had was the bone fragments that we removed. It looks like that will heal and as long as he wakes up on his own with no breathing problems we don't see a reason why he wouldn't survive."

I can see everyone breath again. Their shoulders fall slack and their eyes are filled with hope. I am filled with hope too because my husband might wake up from this. I wonder if he could hear me when I was talking to him. I wonder if he thinks I am awake. Maybe I helped pull him out of it.

"So he'll be okay?" the Sheriff asks.

"Yes, if no more problems arise, he will be okay. The pain will be quite a lot for a while so we have him on morphine for right now."

"That's pretty strong."

"The pain will be that strong, unfortunately."

Kira looks over at Scott who nods with desperation in his expression. I know he wants to take it away. I know when he sees Stiles he will even if it hurts him more. He won't care.

"When he wakes up, can we see him?" Scott asks.

"I'm afraid it will be family only for a while."

"He's family. He's his brother," Melissa says. "And that's his wife."

Malia pulls her lips together and crosses her arms. She wants to see him as much as the rest of them. She is one of his best friends. Kira rests a hand on Malia's arm as she leans closer to her.

"You'll see him, Malia," she promises. She shakes her head with a frustrated expression.

My mom perks up after hearing all of the news about Stiles.

"What about my daughter?" mom asks.

"Her condition hasn't changed. There isn't much we can do at this point it's all up to her."

Mom nods and they all go back to sitting down and waiting for Stiles to be able to see people. He has to wake up first and they have to check him over before he can see people but I know what he will do. He will want to see me. He will want to see his dad and Scott. He won't want to sit down and not be able to see me even though he is going to have to be okay with that for a while.

The nurse calls three people back at a time. John, Scott and Melissa go back first. Kira stays out with Malia and says they need to see him more than she does anyway. I guess that might be true. When they stop in his room the nurse says, "He's just coming out of it. You can only stay a few minutes because he needs to rest. Please try not to get him worked up. We have him on medication but much movement at all will not be good for his broken bones."

"Understood," Melissa says and the nurse nods before opening the door and allowing them in.

Inside Stiles is lying with his eyes open. It's so nice to see the color of his eyes again. They are sad but at least they are open. His skin color is pretty pale but they took the bandage off of his face. He has stitches on his forehead and large scratches from the glass on his left cheek and an iv in his arm. I can tell it makes him uncomfortable. He is trying not to think about it. All three of them gather around his bed. His dad holds onto his hand while Stiles tries for a half smile.

"Hey dad," he says. His voice is rough, he had a tube down his throat during surgery to keep him breathing. Luckily everything went well and he'll be okay but his speech is quitter than normal. That has to do with the drugs he is on as well.

"Hey son," he says. "You scared us."

"Sorry," he mumbles and winces, closing his eyes as his chest rises rapidly for a few seconds. The Sheriff legs go of his hand to touch his face when Scott puts his fingers over his friends. I watch the spidery black liquid find its way up Scotts hand and into his arm. He groans in pain but Stiles's mouth opens slightly and he leans his back up just a little. He sighs when Scott moves his hand.

"Don't do that," Stiles says though I can see the pain relinquished from his body. His arms are less tense, his face is relaxed and his voice is slightly stronger. But he won't admit that.

"Why not?" Scott asks.

"Just don't do it."

"Shut up, man."

Stiles smiles back at Scott. Then his face falls and I know he's thinking about me. I wish he could hear me. I wish I could tell him to stop that. I'm not dead yet.

"Stiles?" Melissa asks. "What is it?"

"Lydia."

"She'll be okay," John says.

"You don't know that. Only she knows that," he says.

"She has to be okay Stiles," Scott says but Stiles shakes his head as I can see him get more and more visibly frustrated. He wants to believe that but he just can't be happy for something that might not happen.

"Mom didn't get better. They told me once that she would be okay but they lied. She didn't get better, she got worse and worse until she died," Stiles says.

"We don't know that yet. When we know that we can deal with it but until then she is very much alive," Scott insists.

He tries to accept that or at least understand it for a while.

"I want to see her," he blurts out.

"You have to get better first and then you can see her."

"Where are my kids?"

"At home. We had Stella keep them. We can have her bring them here if you want."

"Could you? I would really like to see them," Stiles says. "I'll be the one to tell them about their mother."

"Okay we'll call Stella."

"You and Kira are okay right?" Stiles asks.

"Yeah we're fine," Scott answers.

"Malia is here too, she wishes she could come in," Melissa tells him. He nods and breathes heavily for a long moment.

"Is she okay?"

"Slightly…yeah."

The nurse walks in then with her hands in front of her.

"Sorry guys Stiles needs rest," she says.

They nod but Scott stays back when Stiles grabs his hand and pulls him over.

"You're all right man," he says.

"I know. Can you do something for me?"

"Anything."

"When Lydia can see people can you take my kids?"

"Of course."

They leave with Stiles thinking he's alone in the room. I walk over and sit right next to him with my hand in his. He sighs as I see a tear escape his right eye. He wipes it away and then drops his arm behind his head as he stares at the ceiling.

"Lydia I don't know if you can hear me," he starts. "But…we've been through a lot worse than this. We've been trapped in Eichen house before, we've almost been killed more times than I can count, I've even been possessed by a dark spirit. So I think we can do this if we do it together just like we do everything else. I got you out of Eichen House so I think I can get you out of a coma. But that means that you have to be willing to work with me. I know when you told me you had Ariel you said you could you do this yourself and I said, 'I know. But I can't.' And I can't do this by myself either. Raising the kids is not an option without you around. I will not be my father.

"Lydia, I know you are listening to me. I need you to do me a favor. I need you to let me save your life. Let me be your emotional tether and let me pull you out because you always pull me out. So it's my turn now."

He closes his eyes for a long moment. I rest my head on his hand and drape my arm across his waist.

"I love you Stiles," I say.

"I love you Lydia," he says and I don't have to wonder if he heard me.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello again! You've got it! Stydia babies! Enjoy! Don't forget to review and leave comments on what more you want to read about!**

09:45.

I hear a knock on my door. I sit up and croak out something for them to open it. Scott walks in just to open the door slightly.

"They're here. Are you ready for them?" Scott asks.

"Of course, thanks man."

He turns around and opens the door a little further. He puts his hand on the back of my little red head's hair. When she sees me she smiles and runs over.

"Be careful, Daddy has still has a lot of healing to do," Scott warns. She slows down but still jumps up on the bed. I try to hold onto my ribs and not let it hurt. I hold her as she leans her head on my shoulder.

"Where is Luke?" I ask Scott.

"Malia is holding him. He fell asleep on the way here. Do you want me to get him?"

"Actually could you ask if she would be okay with keeping him for a while longer. When he wakes up or she gets tired she can bring him in. I just want to talk to Ariel for a while."

"Yeah okay," Scott says. "If you need anything just call me."

"Thanks."

I look over at my very concerned daughter. Her strawberry blonde curls fall around her chubby cheeks. She is wearing a light blue sparkly shirt and patterned pants. She gets her insane fashion sense form her mother as well as her loud voice and red hair of course. But she is kind of goofy like me and a lot hyperactive like me. At least we both know how to handle it.

"Daddy what happened?" she asks.

I push her hair from her face as she kneels in front of me, moving around erratically. We learned very early that my Ariel has ADHD like me but it's not a severe case. I take a small breath, wishing I could take in more air but trying not to think about it. Thinking about will make me think I can't breathe and that will make me have a panic attack and I can't risk a panic attack right now.

"We were in a car accident. We were hit by two other cars and my jeep flipped so now I have a few broken bones. I'll heal," I tell her. She screws her face in a funny expression and then sighs.

"How long until you are all better? Uncle Scott said weeks," Ariel says.

"Uncle Scott was right it'll probably be weeks, Ariel."

"But where is my mommy?"

Here it goes. I try to clear my throat to make my voice sound like her father again.

"Mommy is in another hospital room. She is very sick. She is asleep right now."

"When will she wake up?" she asks.

"I don't know baby girl. I wish I did but I don't."

"Does she have any broken bones?"

"No, she's just asleep and she can't breath-" I pause, "on her own right now so they have machines on her. You can see her later. It may look scary but really it's just to help make her better."

"Does she have a broken heart?" she asks.

"No sweetie," I say.

"You could fix that right?"

"Probably."

She leans down, holding herself up with her arm and puts her hand on my shoulder. Her skin is pale just like her moms and mine I guess. She looks a me like her mom does sometimes, like she knows I am hiding something and she knows that I am going to have to give it up eventually. I kiss her hand and then put it back. I rest my head back on the pillow and try not to think about breathing, which only makes me think about it more. It hurts to even think about. The pain is starting to bother me more and more as the day moves on. It starts to hurt again. There is no position I can get into to make it better. It restricts my breathing and scares me sometimes because I feel like I am suffocating and now proper amount of air can get through my lungs.

"Daddy?" her little voice asks.

"Yeah baby?" I ask.

"Are you scared?" she asks.

"Why do you ask that?" I put my arm around her as she leans close to me. I let her snuggle in and her face nuzzles into my chest.

"Because mommy asked you that one time when you looked like that," she says.

"I'm fine."

I can smell her strawberry scent. She smells like her mother. I feel really overwhelmed, something just came crashing down on me. I try to take a deep breath and I can't. I try again. It hurts so bad. I can feel tears start to form in my eyes. No. Ariel won't see me cry. I won't let her. I breathe and calm down. I start to hear something else. I start to hear a voice. The most beautiful voice I have ever heard.

 _"_ _It's okay Stiles. I'm still here. I'm still here but you need to take care of our daughter right now."_

It's Lydia and she's right.

I lean back and Ariel rests her head on my shoulder as we look up at the ceiling.

"When can you come home?" she asks.

"Not for a while."

"Where will I stay?"

"Uncle Scott and Aunt Kira say you can stay with them for a few days. You can come here during the day and see me."

"When can I see mommy?"

"As soon as they say you can."

"When will that be?"

"You're impatient," I say and play with her curls. "Like me. I don't know when baby. Hopefully soon."

"Where will Luke stay?"

"Aunt Malia is going to take him for a while I think."

"Oh." She looks sad. She loves having her brother around.

"I know but it won't be for very long. Just a couple of days. I'll be out of here in no time."

"Do you promise daddy?" she asks and holds out her pinky. I wrap mine around her tiny little finger and look her right in those brown eyes.

"I promise, Ariel."

There is a knock on the door and then it opens. I look over to see Malia holding my baby boy. He smiles when he sees me and claps his hands together.

"Dada! Dada!" he exclaims.

"Hey buddy!" I say and open my arm for him.

"You want to hold him?" Malia asks.

"Of course I want to hold my baby. Just put him here he'll be fine for a little while."

She rests him right on my arm as Ariel moves over to let him sit with me.

"Thank you Malia," I say.

"No problem," she says and then pauses. "How are you feeling?"

I shake my head.

"Worried about Lydia?"

"You have no idea."

She puts her hand on mine. I try to let it relax me a little bit. I don't want to think about what might happen but having her here makes me feel a little less far from the world.

"If anyone can wake her up you can. You've done it before Stiles. You can do it again. She listens to you. She loves you," Malia says.

"I hope I can."

"You can. We'll all be here Stiles."

"You don't have to stay with her. You have other things to do." She shakes her head and smiles.

"I'd never leave you behind."

I bite my lip and nod. Of course not. She's too reliable, too much of a good friend for that.

"Scott told me that you'd be willing to take Luke in for a while. Thank you so much. It'll probably only be a few days, really. I should be out of here."

"But you are going to want to be with Lydia. It's okay Stiles. I've got him. I'll bring him here everyday so you can see him and he'll sleep at my house with me. I've got him, seriously."

"You can stay at my house if you want. All of his stuff is their. If you want to it might be easier."

"Thanks," she says.

She moves her hand and starts walking back towards the door.

"If I don't go they are going to come kick me out because I'm not family. I told them I was just dropping him off," she says.

"You are family Malia. My kids don't call you their aunt for convenience," I say.

She smiles and nods towards the door.

"Do you need anything?" she asks.

"Yeah actually. Can you find me a _Star Wars_ movie?" I ask her. "Literally any of them."

She laughs and nods. "Of course. I'll be back."

Luke falls into the bed. He only just turned one last month. But he likes to snuggle. He lays down with me and rests his head on my shoulder as Ariel sits on the other side of him. I put my hand on her knee. I feel so much better having both of my kids with me. At least they are something to focus on.

"Dada," he says again.

"Hey Luke. Missed you."


	5. Chapter 5

**Don't forget to review and follow! Thanks!**

Chapter Five

I Need a Friend

Stiles

It's 10:23 the next morning. Lydia hasn't changed.

Sometimes men just need a feminine touch to calm us down. Sometimes we need a female to give us another way to think about things. We get all stuck in our own heads and we can't think straight without someone getting us out of it. Sometimes other men can do it but we're afraid to show each other real emotions at least most of the time we are. So when it's a girl, they expect emotion. They want it actually so we feel more able to give it to them and to let ourselves feel a little bit. As much as I don't want to maybe I should. I sit propped up with about four different pillows and my legs crossed in front of me. I flip through pictures on my phone. I don't really have anything else better to do. I know it's depressing me but I have to get ready for the reality.

"They told me that she isn't getting better," I say. "They told me that she doesn't have very good odds of making it out of this one."

Malia puts her hand on my knee as she sits in front of me. She looks sadly at me for a long moment. She isn't going to tell me that it will be pay because she knows that it probably won't be.

"I don't know how to deal with that," I admit.

"I don't think you are supposed to know," she says.

I look down to see my entire family smiling at the beach. The next photo is jus of my beautiful wife. She's wearing that greenish blue bikini and she's sitting with her feet in the sand at the beach. The sun is falling down on her perfect skin, her hair in curls along both of her shoulders. She looks so happy. That was last summer a few months after Luke was born. She looks really good for just a few months after being pregnant but she was determined so I guess it makes sense. It's strange there was never a time I thought she was more beautiful then when she was carrying my children. I told her all the time. I don't know if she believed me but I really believed it and I still do.

"She's really beautiful," I whisper.

"I know," she says and takes my phone from my hands.

"I think it would be a good idea if you put that down for a while." She pauses. "Do you want to talk about something?"

"I- I don't know. What am I supposed to tell my children?" I ask.

"I don't think you are supposed to tell them anything yet. She is still alive."

"Ariel keeps asking me, when."

"And you will keep telling her the same thing. Tell her that you don't know and you hope it will be soon because that is the truth and that is all you have right now."

I start to feel overwhelmed again but this time I can't stop it. I am in so much excruciating pain. It's not just my inability to breath. It's the pain that is aching all over my body. It's like m body can feel her losing the battle. I hate that. I hate that I have become so connected to her that I know that she is not doing well. My heart is starting to beat faster. I don't think I can focus on anything. My arm hurts too, so bad that it is radiating to my back. I try to rest it and yet it still hurts. I hold onto my chest with my other hand and try to breath. I remember that I can't. I can't breathe. I can't breathe with all of this suffocating pain going on.

"I-I can't do this."

I can't breathe. I can't. I'm starting to hyperventilate. I hold my chest as tight as I can while I lean forward and start rocking to do anything to get my breathing back to normal. It all hurts. All of it. If she doesn't make it out I'm done. I can't do it. I really want to say that I am strong enough to keep going but I am not a hero like the rest of these people. I need her to live. I'll be more than devastated. I'll be incomparable.

"It hurts. I-I can't."

Everything is hurting again. What will I do without her? How will I raise my kids? Then there are other stupid questions that I think about in moments like these. I know I shouldn't care but I have to think about it. Will insurance cover all of this? What will we have to pay? How long will I be out of work? What about the kids? Where are they going to do during the day while I stay with Lydia? I can't pay a babysitter for that long. Well I guess I don't know how long _that long_ is but I'll find out.

My entire body is trembling with terror. I am starting to feel cold again. I wrap my arm around myself wishing that I could see Lydia, feel her touch on my skin again. She could help me. She could help the kids and our friends. Why did this happen?

I hate hospitals. I hate that they smell like bleach and that there is so much pain and death involved. I hate that there is blood and needles. I hate that there is a needle in me now. I look down at the sharp object in my skin and feel uneasy right away. It's pumping medication into me. My vision is blurring. I can't hold on much longer.

"Stiles!" I hear someone shout. It was loud, I think but I can't really respond to it. Everything hurts too much.

"Stiles! Come on focus on me!" I don't even know who it is. I close my eyes and try to keep from feeling so dizzy and in so much pain. Maybe I can stay conscious. Though I am not sure if that is better than passing out. Maybe I would feel better if I was asleep. Maybe I should let myself let go. I'm worried that if I let go that I won't be able to wake back up. My tether is incapable of getting to me right now.

"Focus on me, Stiles. It's Malia," she says. I can hear it now. I can hear it in her voice. It's Malia. I look up at her and hold onto my chest. I try to focus on her and focus on the sound of her voice, what she is saying, the words that she is saying.

"I-I'm t-trying," I tell her.

"You are going to be okay but I need you to relax your breathing. Just breathe with me."

I try but I can't. It's not working. My body is taking over. It's too law for me to get back into control.

"No. I can't. I can't do this!"

"You have to do this! Stiles. Listen to me. Lydia wants you to focus on your breathing and not worry about anything else. She wants you to stop freaking out. So stop freaking out. Just think about me and how I am talking to you."

"I think…I-I think I am going t-to pass out."

"You won't if you listen."

I feel her grab my hand and squeeze it tight. Focus on he sound of her voice. Not anything else. My mind is suddenly falling blank but the pain is still here and it is all over my body now. She leans over and presses the button on my iv a few times.

"Now relax into the bed. Put your head back and relax into the bed. Focus on each of your muscles and release the tension from them."

And slowly it begins to work. When I come out of it I am shaking and in terrible pain. Malia pulls me in for a hug so I rest my head on her shoulder and catch her apple and coffee scent. She wraps both arms around me and traces circles to keep me calm.

I feel the burning come forward. The tears are filling up my eyes and my teeth are chattering. She holds me as tight as she can for a few seconds before the trembling hits me hard. I can't stop it. I let myself cry for the first time since the accident. I let myself really cry and it hurts so bad all over. I can't breath.

"Stiles," Malia says. "Sh. Sh, it's okay."

I keep crying, burying my face in her shirt and gripping her back. She rubs circles in my back, pushing me tight to her so that I can let everything fall over me all over again.

The crash.

The pain.

The glass shattering.

The second hit.

Calling out her name.

LYDIA.

My baby.

The blackness.

Waking up terrified.

How they told me she wasn't awake.

Seeing my babies again.

Holding my babies again.

Trying to convince Ariel that mommy is going to be okay when daddy doesn't even believe that it's true.

All of that combined makes me sob into her. After a long time my body is giving up. All of the tension is gone and there is nothing left for me now. I don't even have sadness. I just have numbness. I lean back on the bed as Malia sets me there. I can feel her hand on my hair and face as she caresses it slightly. I hear her voice through a thick layer of fog like she is talking to someone. My eyes close.

"What happened?" someone else asks.

"He had a panic attack and he just…he…" she seems to break off or I can't hear the rest.

"Is he okay?"

"No," she says and she's right. I don't feel okay. "He just started crying like really badly."

"Let him rest," the voice says. "He needs to rest."

"I'll stay," she says but I don't feel her touch anymore. I hear something moving. The fog is getting thicker. I can't hold onto conciseness anymore. I want to fall asleep.

"He shouldn't be alone. I'll stay."

I hear a loud thud. Maybe a door closing?

I feel Malia put her hand on mine.

"Stay," I think I say.

"I'd never leave you behind," she whispers as the fog takes me over and there is nothing but blackness.


	6. Chapter 6

**This is a flashback. We learn how Stiles and Lydia got** **engaged! Enjoy! Don't forget to review and follow!**

Chapter Six

Family

Stiles

"Stiles," she sighs against my mouth. She starts to fall against me. I catch her and let her lay against my chest. I sigh as we both catch our breath. To feel her body laying on mine, our heat shared, makes me feel so good and so happy. Her hair is so bright red, wet and curly against us both from the sweat. She breaths heavily as our chests raise and fall against each other. I can hear her heartbeat in my ears. I can feel her heartbeat against my chest right between my pecs. She puts her hands under her chin to look at me. I peel pieces of her hair from her forehead and cheeks.

"Stiles I think if we don't stop now we'll never go to sleep," she says as she falls against my side. She snuggles close, throwing a leg over my hips as we play with each others fingers.

"I think you might be right," I agree. It has been hours since we came into our room and closed the door. I fall back against the pillows letting myself sink far into them. Then I think about the ring in my nightstand, the question that I want to ask her. Maybe he was right. I should just ask her when I feel like I should ask her.

Lydia leans her head over so that she can look at my face. She runs her fingers down the side of my cheek and then into my hair, tugging at it very gently and then kissing my chest closest to her mouth. I smile and let her watch my face.

"You look tired," she says with a smile.

"I am tired," I say. "I think you are too."

"Well you did say you wanted to do it lots of times in several different positions," she laughs. I laugh too, seeing her shake slightly as my chest moves with laughter. I drape a hand behind my head and watch my beautiful girlfriend look at me.

"And so we did," I agree.

"You are good Stiles Stilinski I will give you that."

I look over at the nightstand and then back at her. I think I want to. She looks concerned for a moment, looking down at my chest and then back at my face.

"Are you all right?" she asks. "Your heart rate normally gets higher when we are in the middle of it not after it's done."

I smile.

"I'm fine."

I sit up and open he drawer. I take the box out and push myself against the headboard. Lydia widens her eyes at me as if suddenly surprised. Her mouth falls open slightly with those perfect big lips of hers. She shakes her head. I think I am getting more nervous by the second. What if she doesn't say yes? What if this isn't what she wants? Oh god. Here we go. I just have to ask her. I just have to do this.

"Lydia I have a question for you," I say. "And I guess you could say it's kind of important."

"Stiles what-" she starts but I shake my head.

"I love you Lydia. I had a ten year plan and then there were werewolves and Banshees and there was that whole thing where I was possessed by a dark spirit thing." She laughs a little bit. "And then I killed a man who later came back to life, which was also weird. We all hated each other for a while except for us. We were the only ones that didn't hate each other. We were the only ones that were still talking. I don't know if you noticed but I did. And when you left to go into Eichen House I was terrified because I was there. I knew what they did to people and how they treated them. I knew that it wasn't safe for you and that I had to save you somehow. I also knew that it was my job to get you out. I owed it to you because after all we were the only two people that will never really hate each other. Or at least that is what I like to hope.

"I talked with Scott and my dad about this for a while. You know I have a lot of anxiety about…well pretty much everything, actually. But I couldn't make a decision. Anyway when you were just laying here just now with her head on my chest and our hands together…you make me feel so real and so safe. We aren't safe a lot of the time. But I promise that I will always keep you safe. I will always protect you and care for you and listen to you. I will always pay attention to everything that you say even the things I don't want to hear. I want to vow to wake up with you every morning and lay in bed with you every night. I want to vow to be with you for the rest of my life. That's all I've ever wanted. So here we go." I take a long breath. "Lydia Martin, will you marry me?"

She looks at me with compassion, sad eyes and pulls her mouth together. My eyes get glassy. My hands start to shake and I can feel my heart beat getting faster. She's not going to agree. She's going to say no. What do I do? She bites her lower lip as tears well up in her eyes and then she nods. Why? I have no idea.

"Yes," she says. "Of course I will marry you, Stiles!"


	7. Chapter 7

**We're back in the** **hospital. Keep reading! I post new chapters all the time!**

 **Chapter 7**

 **Pain and Gain**

 **Stiles**

16:48.

"Stiles?" Scott asks, sitting at the chair in my room. I sit up with a grunt of pain and he leans over as if to grab me or something but I shake my head. I don't want him to take my pain as amazing as it does feel.

"Yeah?" I ask as I wake up, rubbing my eyes. I try not to think about the amount of pain that is coursing through my veins right now. It's everywhere. It's not only the sharp pain of my ribs and arm that are crushed but also a dull ache that plagues my bones. I know what it's from. I crave her touch. I need to see her eyes again and it hurts worse as she gets worse.

"Stiles," he pauses. "How much pain are you in?"

I shake my head.

"I'm all right," I lie and wince because a sudden sharp pain rushes through my heart. I ball my hand into a fist when I feel Scott put his hand on top of mine.

"No!" I pull away. He looks offended and slightly sad. I know he wants to help me but this is not the kind of pain that he can take away or not the kind of pain that I want him to take away. It hurts so much worse than just broken bones.

"It's not from my ribs," I say.

"Your arm?"

I shake my head. He leans closer with an exasperated expression and puts his hand on mine again. I try to pull away but he is stronger and he makes me stay where I am. I can't fight him either because of my injuries. I let him take it away. At first I can just feel it as if the pain is being sucked out of me. It feels strange and then suddenly good. I gasp when I feel like he is taking my breath away and then he holds my hand tighter. He is groaning in pain I think but it feels so good I can't really tell. It brings tears to my eyes that I don't let fall. The terror that comes with my pain is being pulled out of me through his contact.

Suddenly he let's go and pants as he falls against the side of my bed. I relax against the mattress. My ribs and arm barley hurt. There is still that ache in my body for my unconscious wife but not as bad as it was before.

"It…was Lydia…wasn't it?" he says as he pants.

"Yeah," I say.

"Dude, that's excruciating," he says with empathy all over his face. He puts a hand on my knee for a long moment before he looks up at me.

"I know."

"The kind of pain that I felt wasn't the kind that I normally feel when I take it away," he says.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"It was something worse. It's not a broken bone or a burn or disease, it's a broken heart."

"I know but no one can make all of that pain go away. Only Lydia," I admit. He looks at me with sympathy and rests his hand on mine for a second.

"Why didn't you let me do that before?" he asks.

"Technically I didn't _let_ you do it just now," I say. He laughs.

"Well your sense of humor is back. I guess that's a good sign," he jokes. I try to laugh too then remember my ribs are broken and think better of it. There is a long pause in the conversation because he knows that I don't want to say it.

"I didn't let you before because I didn't want you to have to feel that kind of pain. It's not from the accident."

"It's from Lydia."

I wince and tense my face in pain and fear of showing it. I look away to gather what semblance of control I have.

"It's okay, Stiles. It's allowed to hurt."

I don't know if I should say this. I want to share it with someone. Plus Scott should know.

"It does," I say. "It hurts so bad. All of it hurts. I keep thinking about what I am going to do if she doesn't make it and I don't know. I really don't know. I don't think I can do anything without her."

My voice starts to get choked up so I stop talking. I put my head in my hand, wishing that I had my other hand to cover it up too. I try to control my breathing. I feel his hand on my back in an attempt at comfort. It's a good gesture.

"You don't have to. It's only been two days. She still might come out of it. We don't know. She was just recently stable. I came in here to tell you but you were asleep."

What? Stable?

"As in, like, c-can I see her?"

"We have to ask. I guess it means that she isn't getting worse."

"But not better either?" I ask.

"Right."

The pain is starting to come back.

I press the button on the nurse call thing and they answer.

"Hi Stiles. Is there something you need?"

"Yeah. I need to see my wife."

"I'm coming," she says. I can almost hear her rolling her eyes. My middle aged, blonde nurse comes in minutes later with a wheel chair in hand. Scott gets up.

"Can I see her?" I ask.

"Yes but just for a little while," she says.

"My kids. Ariel has been asking to see her."

"They can see her too. Immediate family only right now. It would be best if they only went in for a few minutes. She is hooked up to many wires and there is a tube down her throat keeping her alive," she says.

"O-okay. S-scott can you get Ariel and Luke please?" I ask him.

"Of course."

"Um hold on son," Nurse Aggie says.

"I need you to help me get him in this chair. It's going to hurt."

Scott nods and walks over behind me. I am able to scoot myself forward towards the edge of the bed with his help. He grabs my arm and helps move me to sit in the chair. It does hurt. Bad. My ribs are killing me and I am still sore from surgery and from he accident. Not to mention that I have bruises all over my left leg internal and external and my ankle is sprained because of the way it hit against the side of my jeep. Scott holds my hand as I fall back in the chair. That is the worst part because I don't abdominal muscles right now. Well I guess I have them but I can't really use them because of the pain that is acosiatejd with it. I relax in the chair, holding onto my side for a few long moments before Aggie starts to move. Scott leaves the room after I thank him to get the kids. She wheels me down to Lydia's room and we wait for Scott to come back. Malia walks over holding Luke.

"Can you hold him?" she asks.

"Yeah," I say. "I'll be fine. Thanks."

She hands him over so I grab him with one arm. He looks around the hospital and claps his hands together a few times. It's one of his favorite things to do. He likes to celebrate a lot even if there is nothing to celebrate. We think he just likes the noise.

Scott comes back holding Ariel's hand. She walks over to hug me gently.

"What are we doing daddy?" she asks.

"Seeing mommy."

"Okay Ariel mommy is right through this door but I have to tell a few rules before you see her," Aggie says.

"Like what?" she asks with a shrug.

"Like you can't pull on any of the tubes that are in her. You have to be very careful around her. She is very sick. She isn't awake and there is a tube down her throat to keep her breathing. Everything on her is to help her, I promise. She is going to feel kind of cold. You can kiss her and hold her hand but that's all, okay? Do you think you can do that for me?"

She nods with a hopeful expression.

I sit back as Aggie wheels us in.

There she is. She's still beautiful. Aggie wheels me right next to my wife and then steps away from us. Ariel leans forward and puts her hands on the bed so she can see her mother.

"Mama," Luke says. "Mama!"

"That's Mama, Luke. Mama is sleeping. Sleeping," I say to him.

"Mama!" he says again. I think he's getting upset. He wants her to hold him. I try to rock him a little bit but he's reaching out towards her now. He wants her, he can smell his mother, see his mother and he wants her. I can't do this. I can't listen to my baby beg for his mother. I want to beg for her too, Luke. I really do.

"Uh Aggie? C-could you get Malia to take Luke, please?"

"Mama," he says again.

"Please, Aggie," I beg. She nods and goes out of the room for just a moment.

"Mama!" he starts to push himself forward to get to her. It's hard for me to wrestle him with one arm and it's starting to hurt my ribs too. I pull him back but it's not easy.

Malia comes back in.

"Mama!" he says again.

"It's okay, Luke," Malia says as she takes him from me. She stops for a moment and puts a hand on my shoulder, leaning over to my ear. "It's okay, Stiles."

I pull my eyes close in pain and she takes Luke out of the room. Ariel looks at her mom as if she is confused. I am confused too, kid. I don't get it either.

"Why won't she wake up?" she asks.

"I don't know, Ariel."

"I wish that she would come play with me."

"Me too."

"Why does everyone seem so sad?" she asks.

"Because car crashes are sad. People get hurt."

"You got hurt," she says.

"And mommy got hurt too. That's why she's asleep."

Ariel leans back so I put my hand on her back and hold her into my good side. She leans close and rests her head on my shoulder for a long moment. I take in her scent.

"Can she hear me?" she asks.

"I think so," I say.

She walks over to her mom by her head and leans close to her face.

"Mommy," she whispers.

"Mommy I think you should wake up because you've been sleeping for a long time. I want to play with you. I want to talk to you. I don't know if you heard but Luke really wants you too. I know because I speak baby and he told me."

I almost laugh. Ever since we had Luke Ariel has been trying to convince us that she can understand him. The strange thing is that I believe her. She's probably a lot like her mother and her mother can hear things no one else can either. I bet she can understand Luke in ways we can't.

"And I know Daddy wants to see you really badly. He misses you and he's sad. I don't want my Daddy to be sad and if you wake up he won't be anymore. Then I will be happy too." I try not to let her know how much she is breaking my heart right now.

She steps back and leans into my shoulder again. Aggie steps forward and puts her hand on my daughters shoulder.

"Okay, sweetheart," she says. "You have to let Daddy have a few minutes to talk to Mommy alone okay?"

"Okay," she says. "Can I go play on the playground?"

"Ask Aunt Malia. I bet she'll take you with Luke if you want," I tell her. She kisses me on the cheek so I pull her close and kiss her on the forehead, holding my baby close to me for a long moment.

"Come on, honey." Aggie takes her out of the room and then closes the door behind her and not I am alone. I didn't think she would let me be alone but I am glad she did. I want to be with Ariel and Luke. I can be with them later I guess. I wish I would heal faster so I could come home with them but they say that I am still in recovery since I was in surgery. I might be able to go home tomorrow but I won't be able to do much. I actually like begin closer to Lydia.

I lean close to her to the point of pain and put my hand on hers. I interlock my fingers in hers and take a breath.

"I know you can hear me, Lydia," I begin. "I know you can hear me."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Hear Me

Lydia

"You know even when you are completely unconscious you are still beautiful? I'm sure you do. I know you can hear me because you could hear me before and you woke up after I talked to you last time. I miss you, Lydia. I miss the way you turn around with a smile when I call your name. And how when I come home you wrap your arms around my neck and kiss me. I especially miss waking up with you next to me. I can't sleep without you. It sounds stupid. I should be fine but I'm not. I miss the way I can smell your hair right under my face, your heat right up against my side and how you interlock your fingers in mine.

"It's not just about waking up. It's about healing and coming back to us. You have-have to come back to us. Not just to me but to everyone. Scott, Kira, Malia, your mom, my dad, Melissa, me….but more importantly you have raise our children. You know how important it is that they see you and talk to you. Our kids need their mother. I know b-because…" he starts to get choked up. His face breaks and the sobs come roaring into his chest.

I want to touch his shoulder. I want to talk to him. I want to help him but I can't do anything. His head falls on my hand. I can almost feel it. His sobs are breaking my heart. He is able to pull himself together for long enough to wipe his face off with his arm and looks at me again to finish what he was saying.

"Because I was raised without a mother. I watched my mom die when I was ten years old. I remember watching her. I remember seeing her in the hospital. She wasn't hooked up to machines for a long time. Eventually in the very end she had something on her that flamed her down. I watched them give her shots, put the needle into her arm. I winced every time they did it. I can't look at the needle in your arm now. It makes me nervous. But I guess you know that. I was there the moment she died. I was holding her hand. In the last moment she was awake. She was talking to me and she said that I was going to be a really good man one day being raised by my father. But I kew that every child needs it's mother. Then she was gone.

"My dad did the best he could with what he had. But it wasn't always easy. At least I was a boy so he knew what boys did but I was hyperactive. I was impulsive and loud and filled with anxiety that caused panic attacks pretty often. I guess I still am most of those things. Ariel needs a women to raise her. She needs a women to teach her how to be one. She needs a women to show her what she is supposed to do, how she is supposed to act and dress. Ariel needs her mother. Luke is still young. He just stopped nursing last month. He still sleeps between us most nights. He still wakes up in the middle of the night to eat. He still wants his mother. So I need you to get better for them."

I want to. In this moment I want to wake up more than I ever have before. Please let me wake up. I have to get up. I have to help him. He needs me to wake up. He needs me to talk to him and to help raise our children. I can almost feel pain as I try to wake myself with tension and power. It doesn't work. I can't do it. It takes too much energy that I don't have. I can't do it.

Tears fall down his cheeks right along the edges of his mouth. His lips tremble as they do when he cries and he rests his head down on my hand again. This time he holds my whole arm with his and tries to squeeze it tight. He needs to feel me respond. I have to at least show him that I am trying to wake up. I will do everything I can to try and wake up. I don't know if he will feel it. It will take everything that I have. I close my eyes and breath as I think about how I can feel his hand in mine. I can feel it. I can feel his rough fingers, his harsh touch, his firm grip. I can feel the touch of his hands all over my body as I have felt them before. I can remember that perfect touch.

I am able to make my body that is lying there almost unresponsive move. My hand curls slightly just enough to move my fingers against his. He looks up at my eyes, a little too hopeful at first. He sighs and then looks back at my hand. He tries to smile through his tears and he holds my hand up to his face. I can feel it. I can feel my hand against his wet face.

"I knew you could hear me," he says with hope. "I knew you could hear me."

I can hear you. Please keep talking, Stiles.

"I will help you get out of this. You told me last time how you woke up after I talked to you. It wasn't just the sound of my voice or the way I needed you to wake up. It was because you knew that you had to be a part of the group again. Well you have to be a part of our extended group again. You just have to heal. Scott told me that the pain he felt wasn't from physical causes. He said it was because my heart was broken. He's right. My heart is broken and it will stay that way if you stay this way. But if you wake up and heal and come home with me my heart can heal too. I'll help you. I will take care of you and I will make everything right again because this was just some stupid accident. It was just a car accident. We have been through everything together. We have survived so much as a pack. We can't lose another pack member. I know that Allison is gone and that we can't change that but we can't lost another one. One is too many, Lydia. One is too many and you know that.

"We have survived the biggest wars ever and we've been all right so we can survive a car accident too." He takes a long breath and then smiles against my hand. "You know it's funny that we aren't immune to things like that. I wish we were. We've been able to live through everything paranormal and then it comes down to something so…human and we are barley scraping through. I know we will make it though because we have been in worse states before. Each one of us has been dying before. Well except for Malia but she was being hunted down to be assassinated so I guess that counts as dying too."

I know Stiles. And I want to listen.

He caresses my hair, moves it from my forehead and pushes his fingers down my cheek. I can almost feel them. I can imagine how they would feel. I am so used to feeling the touch of his skin on mine. It's so natural and beautiful and perfect. I can remember the way his skin feels when it falls against me, when we are sweating on top of each other, or when we are simply holding hands. I can feel him push his hips against my back and wrap his arms around me when he gets home from work. I don't want to lose any of those things.

"I'll work with you if you work with me and you'll wake up. I promised you one day a long time ago that I would always protect you and care for you. I will never break that promise. Especially now when you need it most. I will make sure that you know I can protect you. That is my job after all before anything else."

He leans down and kisses my hand a few times, leaving his lips on my skin.

"I love you, Lydia," he says with a little hope. "I love you so much."

 _I love you too, Stiles. I love you so much._


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Go Home

Stiles

It's been three days. It's 09:32.

I don't want to leave her. I know it's ridiculous because she isn't really here and during the night I can't see her anyway but I have to be here with her. I want to talk to her and be with her. I can only bring her back from this pain if I am here with her. I want to be with Lydia but my son needs to be back home with his father and I need to relieve Malia and her fiancé of the duty of having Luke around.

"You can go home now, Stiles. You are discharged," Aggie says.

"I know that," I say.

"Then why are you sitting in the waiting room with your very bored children?" she asks. I look over and see Ariel with a book that she flips through the pictures. She is only four she can't really read. And Luke is on my lap. He is a rather quiet boy except for when he is screaming. He likes to watch people around him. I guess I like to do the same. I can see things of us both in each of our children.

"Because I don't want to leave her," I say.

"You should bring your children home. Have dinner, go to sleep and then come back in the morning."

I nod.

"Maybe," I say. I know they should go home. I spent too much time in a hospital when I was young. I grew to hate it because of the time that I spent there. I hated needles and the people there. I hated that I knew mom wouldn't get better and she would always get worse. I can't let my children be a part of that. I guess that means I have to bring them back home at some point. That doesn't mean that I have to leave Lydia.

"Where are you friends?" Aggie asks.

"I told them to go home. Scott is coming back after he drops Kira at home."

"Then let him take you home with your children. You need some time away for a while. Lydia will understand that. She is your wife and she loves you. She wants your children to be happy. They'll be better somewhere else," she says.

"I know. I'll let him take us home. You're right. But in the mean time I…uh…" I pause as I become slightly afraid again.

"You want to see her again before you go?" Aggie asks.

I nod and bite my lip. I don't think the kids need to see her again right now. Unless Ariel asks to see her again I think it is best to leave it alone. She doesn't look better and she won't for a while.

"You can always drop your kids off at the day care for a few hours. They would have fun. There are other kids there and toys to play with and things to draw. Plus there is a nursery and people that are adequate to take care of infants."

"Okay, thank you."

"I can take them there if you'd like. You shouldn't be walking."

"Okay."

I look over at Ariel and tape her on the shoulder. She looks up with a smile.

"Ariel do you want to go play with some other children for a while?" I ask her.

"Yeah! Where?"

"Downstairs. There are babysitters there and there children in a nursery. There are toys and things to draw or make. Luke will go too just for a few hours. Then I'll come get you and Uncle Scott will take us home."

"Home? Will Mommy come?" I try not to think about the terror that she is going to face if she doesn't wake up. I am able to steady my breath enough to answer my daughter.

"No baby," I say. "She is not ready to go home. She hasn't woken up yet."

She looks sad again and then sighs and shrugs. She gets up as Aggie walks over to me, holding out her arms for the baby. I kiss his head before handing him over.

"Thank you, Aggie," I say.

"Of course. I'll see you later."

"Can I go in her room now?"

"Yes, here." She hands over a visitor pass so I can open the door and get into her room.

I am able to push myself to stand and then pause. It hurts all over. I start to walking over to her room. I don't even know what I want to say to her. I don't think I want to say anything. I just want to see my wife again. I want to see her to remind myself that she is still alive and that she is not gone yet because it is hard to not hear her voice all of the time and see her move around me. It's strange to not have her in my presence or know that she is off at work or shopping. It's strange thinking that she is just asleep and has been for three whole days.

I sit at the edge of her bed and run my hands over her face and down her arm. I wish she would touch me back. I wish I could feel her responding to my touch as she always used to. I think about talking to her. I think about everything that I want to say and then suddenly my mind is blank. I can't think of anything because there isn't anything to say. I want to see her and I want to be with her but maybe I already said everything that I wanted to or needed to.

After a while of sitting with her, looking at the beauty of her soft hands and the gentleness of her strawberry hair I realize that I should go. I have to get the kids. It's been over an hour. I haven't done anything but sit here. It's just that I want to be in her presence. I want to stay with her for as long as I can. I brush my fingers over her hand and start to stand up, avoiding grunting in pain.

"I have to go for a while Lydia," I say. "I'm going to let you rest and think about how you can get out of this. It's very important that I see you and that you wake up. I am sure you understand that by now. I have to take the kids home. I remember spending a lot of time in the hospital because of my mom. It made me hate the place. Every time I had to go to the doctor I had a panic attack for years even until I was a teenager. Then it just made me nervous so I avoided it all together. I don't want our kids to be afraid of the doctors or of hospitals or of losing you. I want them to believe that you will wake up because they do right now and so do I. I have so much hope. I love you, Lydia. I'll be back."

I get up, looking back at her before closing the door behind me. When I go out to the waiting room Scott is already there and Aggie has brought up the kids. I thank her and pick up Luke, holding him on my good side before she leaves.

"Anything?" Scott asks.

"No change. I talked to her. I think it does help," I say.

"I think so too. If anyone can hear us while completely unconscious, it's Lydia," Scott says.

"Yeah." I look back at the room. It is making me nervous even the thought of being away from her.

"Stop, Stiles," he says. "You have to take the kids home. You have to make sure they are okay. Put them to bed, read to Ariel. Let her eat ice cream and let Luke sleep in your room."

"I will," I say. "Thanks for taking us home."


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

 **Stiles**

 **Flashback to their Wedding**

"I am going to jump out of my skin," I say as I jump up and down in my white button up, bow tie and black pants. I try to calm down to think about something else. Nothing works.

"Your heart beat is really fast," Scott says.

"I know dude. I'm trying to calm down."

"And you reek," Malia adds as she walks up in a light blue dress. She is one of Lydia's bridesmaids. She's the special one, the maid of honor or whatever. I lean back on the wall of the building. The wedding is outside. The isle that she will be walking down is just outside of this door. And I am terrified. I have to walk out first and then Scott goes with Malia and Kira goes with Liam. When I saw Lydia earlier she was really sad. When I asked her what was wrong she shook her head. So I knew. Allison. I miss her too but Allison was Lydia's best friend even before I was her best friend. And she died because of me.

"Sorry," I say to Malia. "It's-"

"Anxiety," she finishes. "What's wrong with you? Why are you so nervous?"

"I'm not nervous."

"What happened this morning when you saw her?" Malia asks. "She came back smelling like tears."

I close my eyes, trying to pretend that didn't hurt my soul.

"Malia would you stop freaking him out, please?" Scott asks.

"It's okay. She's not freaking me out. I'm freaking me out. It's not just about getting married. It's about being married because once I'm in that's it."

"What do you mean?" Scott asks.

"I'm worried she won't want to be with me forever, that she'll realize what she is doing and run. I know it's stupid."

"Yeah it is very stupid. Especially considering how she was just telling Kira and I that she was worried you'd realize your too good for her."

"She said that?" I ask, shocked. That couldn't be further from the truth. She is way better than I am. She didn't kill people. She didn't like killing people, twisting knives in her best friend or murdering innocent people. She doesn't have to remember liking it.

"Stop it dude. You're freaking out," Scott says.

He's right thinking about it makes it worse. It makes me think about how I liked it.

"I know. I keep thinking about when I was the nogitsune and how I killed all of those people," I say.

"Why would you think about that right now?"

"Because I am not good enough for her not the other way around."

"This is crazy! You wouldn't have proposed if you didn't think this was going to work out! And she wouldn't have said yes if she didn't think it was going to work out! So both of you need to shut up!" Malia yells.

She's right. She's totally right.

"Don't think about that right now," Scott says and puts his hand on my shoulder.

"You're right," I say. "You're both right. She was sad about Allison this morning because she isn't here. That's why I'm thinking about it."

"Stop," Scott says and drops his hand.

I see my dad and Melissa come back towards the building. There are two windows in the doors so I can see the crowd. The isle is white with chairs on either side and hanging jewels and flowers from the above cover. The alter is covered in white roses and jewels with pops of blue color including fabric weaved in through the entire thing.

"Hey son," dad says and pats me on the shoulder. "We have to go out there soon."

"I should go back to Lydia," Malia says and then walks over and hugs me. I hold her tight for a long moment trying to listen to her and let it relax me somehow.

"You're my best friend and you made our friend very happy. I'll see you out there," Malia says with a smile and pulls away. I thank her as she walks away.

"I should go back too if we're starting soon," Scott says. "Fifteen year plan. It worked, Stiles. Today you aren't robin, you're freaking Batman." We both laugh a little bit before he nods to go back to walk with Malia.

Now it's just me and my dad. Melissa walked back to be with Lydia before we went out there.

"You did it son," Dad says. "You got the girl you've always wanted. I hoped you would but she's a special one. I've seen how you two act even before you were together. You're marrying your best friend and that's really important."

"Thanks dad," I say.

"Now let's go get married."

I laugh and Melissa walks back over. They interlock their arms together as we all walk out. We don't have to slow walk or anything. We just walk to the front and stand there so that everyone can watch me as I crawl out of my skin. I might actually do that. Especially because everyone is looking at me now. I hate that. I hate that everyone is looking at me. I wish the others would just start walking because they are making me nervous. I try not look as nervous as I feel.

"Hey Stiles?" my dad calls. I look over at him, he's sitting in the chair in the front row not far from me.

"Yeah?"

"Don't pass out."

"Trying over here, dad."

"You're doing a good job, son."

Then the music starts. I convinced Lydia that we should play the Love Theme from Episode II. I wasn't sure if she would agree but it's playing. And just the sound of that makes me relax a little bit more. I can't help but smile because this is going to be one of the best days of my life.

Malia starts walking with Scott. Moments later Kira and Liam. Then there is a pause. And she comes out. Oh my god. I have to remind myself to breathe.

She is wearing a white, long dress with a train draping down the back. She has small amounts of jewels on her veil and dress. But that isn't what I am looking at. I am looking at the joy on her face. I've seen all of her faces and this is my favorite one. She is smiling with a full teethed, truly happy smile. Her lips quiver slightly when she sees me. Her eyes light up with happiness and they get glossy. I smile back at her. For that moment in the universe we are the only ones that exist. I find myself thinking about everything that has to do with her. She is so beautiful.

When she arrives close to me her mom puts her hand in mine. I hold her hand that soothes my trembling fingers. Her mom walks over to her chair and sits down as the man starts to talk but I don't listen to him. I just look at my bride.

"Hi Lydia," I whisper.

"Hi Stiles,"

She hasn't stopped smiling. Neither have I. My eyes are watery but I try to blink it away.

"It's okay," she mouths.

"I love you."

"I love you more," she says back.

"Stiles Stilinski do you take Lydia Martin…"

He continues talking but I only halfway listen. Of course I promise to care for, take care of her, love her, be with her and cherish her for the rest of my life. That is what I signed up for.

"I do," I say.

"Lydia Martin do you take Stiles Stilinski…"

She stares in my eyes the entire time, holding both of my hands tight to steady them. I don't think I have stopped smiling yet.

"I do," she says.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife! Stiles you may kiss the bride."

I lean close and put my hand right behind her face. This is it. We're married. She's my wife and I never have to let her go again.

Our lips make contact and there is an explosion of clapping and cheering but most of all of love. I've never felt her push that much love into physical contact before. We kiss for a few long seconds, pushing each others lips close and then I hold her body close to mine. I want to feel her heart beat against my chest again. I guess I'll have plenty of time for that tonight after this is over.

We pull away after a few seconds and look at the crowd. Everyone is smiling and clapping and cheering. I grab her hand and look at her beautiful face.

"Ready, wife?" I ask her.

"For the rest of my life…yes."

I tug on her arm and we dance back up the isle into the building again. We have to go away for pictures and then go to the reception but I want a moment with my bride. I pull her aside from the people that are traveling all over. I get her to a little sitting room and close the door. I push her against the door and kiss her lips. She leans close to me, wrapping her arms around my neck and putting her fingers in my hair. I couldn't be more excited to never have to let her go. She pulls away just for a moment and looks at my eyes. I smile.

"What?" I ask her.

"I want you," she whispers.

"You have me," I say. "You have me for the rest of my life."


	11. Chapter 11

**Flashback scene. Enjoy!**

Chapter Eleven

Kiss Me Under the Stars

Stiles

He's standing in front of me. I an feel anger roll inside of me. I need his pain to survive. I need his turmoil to continue. Scott looks like a teenager again. He's a little shorter and his face looks a little younger. I think I look like a teenager too. Skinnier and my hair is styled. But I don't pay attention to that. I pay attention to the need for pain inside of me. I need him to give it to me.

He stands there completely afraid with a knife inside of him. I walk close to him with a slight smile. It looks like I am watching myself do this. How am I watching this? I did this. It was me. How am I watching it? I start shaking with hunger as I get closer to him. I wrap my hand on his shoulder and brace him with the other one on the blade.

"Don't," he murmurs.

I can almost feel the blade as it twists in my own hand. I can feel it tear his flesh and open new parts of his body. The pain is what drives me to continue. And when I touch his face I demand, "Now give it to me!" I can feel the hate pulse through my body. It's something dark and evil and I love it. It feels good. Really truly good. It makes me feel powerful and in control of everyone and everything. When it comes through my body I stop and step away. I watch as the other me turns around.

Suddenly we are in a different scene. There is snow everywhere and there are two of me. I am watching the evil me while holding close to Lydia. She looks really young. She is wearing a dress like she often does but her hair is in curls and her face is thinner. Her eyes are less tired. I am leaning desperately on her for help. She is giving it to me. I hold her tight with one arm and then I feel her grip my shoulder. She's afraid. I am too. I know she can feel my body shaking. The other me comes closer. I think he's the nogitsune.

He is right in my face now. He doesn't say anything as he easily pushes me away from Lydia. I fall on the ground. I feel so weak. I lay on the ground, trying to push myself to stand up. I can't. Nogitsune charges Lydia and punches her in the face. She yelps and holds her cheek. Her mouth is bleeding. He kicks her feet out from under her and punches her in the face again. She tries to wrestle for him to stop when out of no where he pulls out a knife. I try to move towards her but I am stopped on the ground. I am stuck here. I can't move. I scream and beg for him to stop. I will do anything for him to stop.

"Kill me! Please! Leave her alone! Please!" I beg. He does nothing. I scream again and this time I keep screaming. This can't be real. I should be able to move. I should be able to get up. There isn't a nogitsune anymore. He's gone and I'm sleeping. I should be sleeping. So I scream. I scream and scream and eventually it wakes me up.

I wake up with a loud shout and jump back in the bed. I grab onto my chest because that is where I feel the fear. That is where it terrifies me the most. The pain, the terror, the anguish is all right here in my own body. It's all over. Then I feel a soothing hand on my shoulder.

"It's okay," I hear a voice say. She rubs my shoulder and puts her other arm around my waist. She leans her body close to me as I put my hand on hers.

"It's okay Stiles," she says. "You're okay."

I am able to catch my breath enough to see that it's just her and she's right. We're okay. That was just a dream. But it still terrified me. I try to calm down and breathe. It takes me a few minutes before I can calm down. I rest my head on her shoulder. She rubs her hand in my hair for a minute. She kisses my forehead and then within seconds I am calmer again. I am still scared though. I can still feel that hate. I can remember liking it. I can remember feeling powerful and in control and…good.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asks. I look up at her when she rests her hands on me.

"It was just about the Nogitsune. But it was attacking you…and-and I c-couldn't move."

"It's okay. That can't hurt either of us anymore," she says.

I nod and she brushes tears from under my eyes but they keep coming. She lays down, pulling me with her. I look at her, wrapping her as close to my body as I can. Then she kisses my lips once and then again. She holds my face close to her and I can start to feel the hate go away. I can feel the evil release out of me. I kiss her again. This time she responds, pulling her body close to mine.

"Stiles, wait," she says and holds my face away from hers.

"What?"

"Are you sure you're okay?"

I nod and pull off my shirt, kissing her again.


	12. Chapter 12

**Stiles gets to go home with the kids but Lydia stays at the hospital. Enjoy!**

Chapter 12

Home

Stiles

I tuck the covers around my red head beauty and start to read her the story of Little Mermaid. It's her favorite. Lydia has it memorized. She used to tell it to her when she was around three but then she became obsessed with the story when we told her about her name. I only have two pages left when she starts to fall asleep. I am about to set the book down when I see her eyes open so I continue to read. I start to hear my wife's voice. I can hear the sound of her sweet voice while she reads, how she gets more tired as she does it. I finish the last line and try not to think about how she would look back at me with a smile. Ariel would be asleep, Luke is already asleep. And she would grab my hand and pull me into our room. We'd make love for a few hours before we fell asleep.

Ariel is asleep now. I set the book on her bookshelf and walk out, leaving the door part of the way open. Luke is already asleep in his crib in our room. I take off my clothes from the day and change into a tee shirt and sweatpants as I crawl into bed. I lay back and stare at the ceiling. It feels cold without her here. I try to let sleep take over. I know I am tired but I just can't. I can't seem to feel okay when I know she isn't here with me. I can't protect her from all the way over there. I can't protect her from this house when she's in a hospital. I know she will be okay. I know that she is safe there but I don't like being far away from her.

I lay on my side and hold her pillow to my chest. It still smells like her. I hold her pillow to me as I close my eyes. I feel tears escapes but I wipe them away. I shouldn't be upset. I breathe in her scent as I fall asleep. But it was a bad decision.

She's stuck in a car. I can see her but I can't get to her. There is glass on either side. She can't get out. She is screaming for help. I can see her blood as it drips down her side. She has a huge piece of glass in her side. I try to pull at the glass to get to her but it cuts my hands. I want to pull at the glass and get it out. I have to get her out but the glass won't budge and I can't make it.

"Stiles! It hurts! It hurts!" she screams.

"Lydia!" I shout. "Lydia!"

She screams again but this time it's like a banshee screaming and I wake up with her name on my lips. I pant and hold my chest then realize I am alone. I can't feel the warmth of her body next to mine. I scoot my legs to my chest and wrap my arms around my knees. I try not to feel alone. She's okay. She's alive and she's in the hospital and she is safe there. They are taking good care of her. I am able to calm down. Then I hear someone crying again. It's a babies cry. Luke.

I get up and take him from his crib. I shush him as I hold him close to my chest. I make him rest his head on me and rock him back and forth. He calms down a little bit but I think he's hungry. This is so much easier with Lydia around. When he's hungry I hand him over and she sticks her boob in his mouth and he shuts up. That's what happens when she sticks her boob in my mouth too. I shut up right away. Great now I'm thinking about her naked and-

 _Focus Stiles._

I walk downstairs and prepare a bottle with one hand so it takes a while and he is not exactly happy. I am able to get him to calm down when I put it in his mouth. Good thing he takes bottles because we would have a problem if he didn't like them. That would suck for me. I go back upstairs and hold him while I sit in the bed, the bottle in his mouth. He almost finishes it off before he falls asleep. I take it out of his mouth and set it down. Lydia sometimes puts him in the bed with us when we get lazy about putting him back in the crib. I want his company right now. I set him down gently and cover us both up. I lay back and close my eyes but I can't sleep again. I don't want to dream about Lydia. I think I screamed her name and that could be a problem. That might have been what woke Luke up and I really don't want to wake him up again.

"Hey Lydia," I whisper. "I don't know if you can hear me but…I really miss you. I'm not used to being with them alone. I love our kids but I love you too and so do they."

"Daddy?" I hear. It's Ariel. Why is she up? I sit up gently on my elbows and see her standing in the doorway. Her hair is all messed up and she is carrying that stuffed wolf Scott gave to her when she was born. She loves that thing. She walks in and stands right by my bed.

"What is it sweetheart?" I ask.

"Were you talking to mommy?"

"Kind of," I say.

"Can she hear you?"

"Yeah."

"Why? Is she dead?"

"No! No, she's not dead. She's just special. Mommy can hear things we can't hear. You know that," I say.

"Yeah," she nods. "Can I sleep in here with you?"

We normally say no when she asks if it's like midnight because she likes to do this thing where she sits up in our bed and plays. If she is in her own room she falls asleep. I don't know why but that is how it works. I think she feels lonely like me. I nod and help her up onto the bed. She lays right next to me and nestles into my arm like Lydia does so often.

"What happened?" I ask.

"I couldn't sleep."

"Why not?"

"I had a nightmare."

Break my heart a little more, why don't you?

"About what?" I touch the side of her face gently with my good arm.

"My mommy."

Oh god. We had noticed a while back that Ariel has a few Banshee like qualities about her. And sometimes that really sucks. Like now when she dreamed about her.

"What did mommy do?"

"Nothing but she was in pain. She screamed really loud."

I almost smile.

"She used to do that," I say. "She has kind of a special talent. I'm sure everything is fine. It was just a dream."

"Okay, Daddy. Can I stay with you for the rest of the night, please?"

"Sure baby girl."

She rests her head on my arm and her eyes start to close. I feel Luke breathing beside me. I can almost breathe again too.

"I have Luke on the other side so stay there, okay?" I ask her.

"Okay Daddy." She pauses. "Hey daddy?"

"Do you wish Mommy were awake?" she asks.

"More than anything right now."

"Do you hurt?"

"Yeah but it's my left side, Ariel you don't have to worry about that over there."

"No. I meant about Mommy."

I look up at the ceiling and practically see Lydia's face, hear her words and feel her touch. I want that all back so badly. So badly I can feel it.

 _Please Lydia. Please._

"Yeah, Ariel," I say. "I hurt."


	13. Chapter 13

**This is a flashback that Lydia remembers.**

Chapter 13

Are you sure?

Lydia

I took three tests just to be sure and they all came out with the same answer. I had to be positive. I tried not to get very excited the first time it said yes but the second time I jumped up and down so by the third I am freaking out. We haven't really been trying for that long or anything. We just said let's not use protection anymore about two months ago and we said we could have a baby. We both decided that we might as well have a baby if we can, we have been married for a few years and we decided that we both want one or two or three. Let's just start with one. Not that I know about this kind of thing. I've never been pregnant before.

I have to think of a way to tell him. I don't want to call him up and tell him because then he won't focus on his work the entire day. I need him to do that. He makes me nervous enough when he leaves and the stories he tells me. But I have to tell him when he gets home. He gets home around five each day unless he takes night shifts, which I hate and he hates too but he does it when he has to. He has no idea that I could be pregnant. I just got the tests this morning so he didn't even know that I took them. And now I'm pregnant. It's really happening. We're going to have a baby.

First I call the doctor and make an appointment. The closest one is next week. I think I should tell him before I go. He might want to go with me or something. But I am on the phone with the doctor.

"Can't wait to see you and your baby next thursday Mrs. Stilinski," she says.

"Thank you." I hang up. I never get tired of hearing people call me that. It just sounds so good. I love responding to it. I go downstairs and search the kitchen for something to make him special for dinner. He makes dinner sometimes, he's pretty good at it. But I think tonight I will make something I know he will really like. Great idea. Homemade pizza. He loves pizza. I think that is his favorite, though he has more than one. I get out the ingredients and begin making them. I can't help but wonder what our child will be like. I want to know if it will be a boy or a girl but I want to know more than that. I want to know what it's favorite color will be. I want to know who it will take after, if it'll be left or right handed. I'm left and Stiles is right handed. I want to know if it'll have red hair or dark brown, maybe even be a blonde. You never really know. I love that I could think about all of these things. I try not to. I know that it's early and maybe we shouldn't celebrate all that much but why not? We have to celebrate a life. We have to celebrate the fact that no matter what this is our baby. Our baby.

When I tell him he is going to freak out. Later in the day when I am sitting down, reading I think about Allison all of the sudden. I don't mean to. She just comes into my mind. I feel really sad, like something just feel on my shoulders and chest. But I don't want to be. I don't want to be sad. I wonder how different things would have been. We would have seen Isaac more. He wouldn't have left. Maybe they would have been together even now. I can't help but think if she didn't die…would Stiles have survived? If he didn't survive I wouldn't have either. If he didn't make it through that Scott would have died. I think those boys are actually physically connected. They know things about each other they shouldn't as they happen. Scott couldn't have made it through.

And then Kira would have left for good. Liam would have been alone. He wouldn't have been able to survive on his own. We would have all been gone. We are a pack. Every member of the pack is essential to it's survival. If one of us goes, we all go. When they saved me from Eichen House it was one of the hardest things they had to do. It was almost as bad as getting the nogitsune out of Stiles. I guess they were pretty similar. We're both pretty broken people. But we managed it. And that gives me hope because if we made it through all of those things together we can make it through having a baby too.

I'm not going to lie, begin the first out of the pack to have a baby is kind of exciting. I can't wait to share it with everybody but I also don't want to tell everyone right away. I wish I could share it with Allison. She is my best friend. She will always be my best friend. I will always love her. I know she knows about my baby and about me being with Stiles. I wish I knew if she were surprised. I think a lot of people weren't when Stiles and I got married. I feel like they were all waiting for it. Maybe they won't be that surprised when we tell them about this baby too.

I look at the clock when I hear the front door open with the key. I stand up and go back to cooking again. Stiles comes in and I hear him set his bag down.

"Mm! Something smells wonderful!" he says as he walks in the kitchen. He wraps his arms around me, against the back counter and kisses my forehead.

"Are you making homemade pizza?" he asks.

"Yes I am."

"You are the best wife in the whole world," he says and starts to kiss my neck. He holds my sides as I kiss him back. He leans in on the kiss and holds me tightly to his chest. I put my hands in his hair and kiss him on the lips. He kisses me back and lifts me onto the counter. He pushes my skirt up my thighs and moans against my lips.

"Stiles," I say.

"I missed you all day."

"I missed you too."

"So much," he says and pushes up my shirt. I lean close to him as he tries to kiss my neck again.

"Stiles?" I ask.

"Hm," he seems to be lost in the kisses. He seems to be lost in the love. I kiss him back but try to talk to him at the same time.

"Stiles," I say again.

"Hm," he says.

"Stiles I have to tell you something."

"Lydia," he moans.

"Stiles I'm pregnant," I blurt out.

He stops kissing me and pulls away just a little bit so that our faces are close to each other.

"What?" he asks with pursed lips. I love to see him in his uniform. It makes me so happy. He looks so handsome. I put my hands in his hair and kiss his cheek once.

"Stiles, we're going to have a baby."

He raises his eyebrows and his eyes get all misty. His mouth opens slightly and he looks almost confused.

"A baby? You're pregnant?" he asks again.

"Yes," I say. "Stiles we are pregnant."

"Oh my god! Lydia! Lydia! We're going to have a baby!" he shouts and holds me against him. He lifts me off of the counter and spins me around once as he holds me closer. We both laugh and then he sets me down on the ground. He has tears in his eyes when I kiss him again.

"We're going to have a baby!" he says loudly and then kisses me. I pull him against the counter.

"I have my first appointment next thursday. You can come if you want."

"Of course I am going to go. I'll go to every single one!" he shouts. I laugh as I kiss him again. We hold each other close as I hear the oven beep. I walk over and take the pizza's out.

"You made homemade pizza?" he asks.

"Of course I did! To celebrate!"

"You are the best wife in the entire world and I love you with every ounce of my being, Lydia Stilinski."

After that we don't talk for a few minutes. We let the pizza cool but in that time he grabs my hips and pulls me to him.

"Is it safe to have victory sex?" he asks.

"I asked the doctor about that too and she said there shouldn't be a problem if everything seems normal."

"So that means…"

"Yes, Stiles. We can."

"Good," he says and pulls on my skirt again. "I've wanted you all day, every minute of the day."

"And I've wanted you too."

He kisses my neck down to my chest and then pulls my shirt off my head. I fall back against the counter as he kisses me harder. He reaches up and moves his hands all over my skin. I love the way he feels against me. I love the way he touches me. His hands work so perfectly with me. He pulls my skirt down and it falls around my feet. He kisses right above my abdomen and then a little lower, letting the kisses get sloppier. He unbuttons his shirt and takes it off when I start pulling at it. Then he stops right at my stomach, leaving his face there.

"Hi baby Stilinski," he whispers.

Tears form in my eyes before I have the chance to stop them.

"I'm your daddy," he says.

"I love you very much even though you don't know me yet. I don't really care if your a boy or a girl but I can't wait to find out."

He kisses his way back up and then captures my lips. He pulls away when he tastes the salt.

"What's wrong?" he asks. "Why are you crying?"

"Because I couldn't be happier."

"Me either, Lydia," he says. "I love you so much."

"I love you too. I am so excited to be the mother of your child."


	14. Chapter 14

**Another flashback in Lydia POV. Giving birth to their child.**

Chapter 14

Labor

Lydia

"How are you doing Lydia?"

"Well I'm going to have a baby so every five minutes everything hurts but other than that, I'm great," I respond. Stiles sits beside me, holding my hand as we wait. I have been in labor for eight hours and we haven't had anything yet. They keep telling me that since it is my first child it might take a while for my body to get ready for birth but that's kind of making me mad because it still hurts. A contraction isn't just in my stomach it's my back too and sometimes I can feel it a little bit in my legs. I heard once that pain radiates.

When Allison died I felt it radiate to me. We all felt it as if it started with her and traveled through all of us until it the last person and she was gone. At least now in the moments where it doesn't hurt I can actually speak and function but when Allison was gone I didn't know what to do. None of us did. And then they took Aiden too and that was it. I just wanted to pass out. Neither of those people deserved to die. They took Aiden from his brother. Ethan deserved to have his brother. That wasn't fair to any of us. They were helping us. We had been friends with both of them for a while. The Nogitsune ruined it all. When Stiles grabbed me he was the only thing holding me up.

"Lydia?" Stiles asks. I feel him sit beside me and I look over with blurry eyes. I hadn't realized I was crying. I hold his hand in mine and lean close to him as the pain starts again. He holds me until it goes away and then he wipes the tears from my eyes.

"It hurts that bad?" he asks.

"No," I say.

He raises his eyebrows, pulling them together for an explanation.

"Allison."

"Oh Lydia," he sighs and kisses my temple. I lean close to smell his beautiful, masculine scent. I smile a little bit and kiss his cheek. Another hour passes and the baby hasn't moved, meaning nothing has happened yet. When the come back around to check me I hold onto Stiles' hand.

"You haven't dilated anymore. You haven't reached four centimeters yet. We want to order an ultrasound to check on the baby."

"Is there something wrong?" Stiles' asks.

"It might not be _wrong_ sometimes the baby just doesn't want to cooperate."

We both nod and then we wait for them to get the ultrasound. She puts it on my stomach and moves the cool gel around until we hear a heartbeat. I notice my husbands immediate smile when he hears our daughter. I wait as the doctor watches the screen.

"The baby has flipped around. It's head is up towards the top of your womb."

"So what does that mean?" I ask.

"We might have to do a c section."

"I don't want a c section."

"Well we might not have much of a choice."

"Can't we wait to see if she turns around again?" Stiles asks.

"Normally we could wait a little bit longer but it seems that she is under quite a bit of stress. Her heart rate has increased. We need to watch her carefully."

"Is there something wrong with her? I mean…Lydia and the baby will be fine right?" Stiles asks.

"As of right now we have no reason to jump to any conclusions or worry about anything that isn't yet a problem."

Well a few hours later when I could barley breathe and the babies heart rate jumped to over 140 every time a contraction hit we had reason to worry. We had, like, a lot of reason to worry. It hurts so bad. The contractions are closer together but not close enough to make me dilate and my baby is under too much stress. We have to get her out. For a while I was walking or swaying or doing anything to help progress things but nothing was working. I lean over Stiles shoulders as another contraction hits. He doesn't speak much after the last time I yelled at him for talking. He just holds onto me. He tries to keep his arms steady for me but he has started to shake. I notice when he isn't holding onto me he bites his nails and his eyes jitter around the room.

I can hear an alarm. It's a loud flashing beeping noise as if something is going wrong. I look around the room. Stiles doesn't hear it.

"Stiles," I whisper.

"Yeah?"

"Do you hear that?"

"Nothing but you and me."

"You don't hear an alarm?" I ask.

"No, Lydia," he says. "There is no alarm. Is something wrong?"

"We're gonna be fine."

He nods.

"We're not turning into a nogitsune or getting attacked by the dread doctors or even by the benefactor. We're just having a baby. They do this all the time here."

"I know," he says.

Suddenly an alarm goes off as another contraction hits. This is the harshest one so far. Stiles jumps up and grabs my hand, rubbing circles on my stomach as the contraction wracks through my entire body. The pressure is immense and the terrible sharp pain in my back is much worse. This is the worst one yet. I lose my breath and grab onto Stiles as hard as I can. The alarm is still going off.

Seconds later the doctor walks in and does another check. Then he listens to the babies heart and then looks at my contraction monitors. He looks at the screen then back at me.

"I think at this point the best option would be to do an emergency C-section," he says.

I nod because it is all I can do. The pain is mostly gone but now it is a dull ache that is around my entire stomach and back. Stiles holds my hand as they come back in with paperwork and nurses to get me ready for the C-section.

"We're gonna be fine," I tell Stiles.

"I know. I'll be right there with you. We're going to meet our daughter." He smiles. He's right. And I can't wait.

They prep me and bring me back. They put the epidural in my back and then lay me down. Soon I can't feel anything bellow my chest. I have my arms out on either side of me and I am staring at the white light above my head. I try not to be nervous. It is so cold in here. I start to feel like I am only halfway here. The other half of me wants to fall asleep or at least close my eyes. I want to see my baby. And then I feel a familiar hand on mine. Fingers caressing my forearm.

"Stiles," I mumble.

"Hi baby," he says. "Ready to meet our daughter?"

I manage a nod.

"How you feeling?"

"'M okay."

I start to feel pulling. There is a bunch of pressure and pulling. I think my body is jerking around but I don't really know. I can't see from the sheet that is covering my lower half. Stiles sits right by my head with his hands on my arm or around my face.

"You cold?"

I nod.

He touches his fingers on my arm softly and then on my face to move my hair from my eyes. I think I am sweating slightly but I am freezing in here. Also I feel strange not being able to feel the rest of my body. I try to breath carefully.

"Stiles you can watch us pull her out if you want," a nurse says.

"No thanks. I'll wait until she's out," Stiles says. "That's a lot of stuff I don't want to see."

I smile a little bit and see him smile too. His eyes are starting to get glassy, thinking about meeting our daughter. I feel the same way. I am so excited to hold our baby. We have waited so long to see her.

"Okay Lydia we are going to need you to breathe how we practiced. You are going to feel a lot of pressure but your baby is almost here."

I do as he tells me for several seconds and then I start to breath normal again as the pressure is relieved. I hear a cry. A baby wailing. My baby wailing. My baby.

"It's a girl!" the doctor exclaims.

I feel tears on my face. The grip on my hand tightens to the point of almost pain. I see Stiles look up and then I do the same.

"Congratulations mom and dad you have a daughter!"

Then I see my baby.

She's so beautiful. She is covered in blood and white chunks and other strange substances. Her mouth is open and she is wailing. She is so loud for a newborn. I guess she gets that from me. She has hair on her head but it looks light. I can't quite tell what color it is. Her eyes are squeezed shut but when she opens them she looks right at me. And I am the first person she sees. Her cries don't stop but I know she knows I am her mamma. I hear hiccuped breathing coming from Stiles. Then they take her away to clean her off.

"She's so beautiful," Stiles whispers and wipes his face off with the back of his hand. I smile and roll my head towards him. I feel more pressure and then a strange tingling feeling. Something is fading. All of the sudden all I can feel is Stiles holding my hand. That's it. I am still breathing but my vision is getting blurry. I feel really tired. I just want to close my eyes. If I close my eyes then I can fall asleep. If I close my eyes than I won't be able to see my baby. Wake up, Lydia.

"Lydia? Lydia? Lydia!" Stiles calls to me. I can see his worried expression. He looks really scared. There are still tears on his cheeks but they are from seeing our daughter. I'm fine, right?

"Stiles," I say.

"Are you okay baby?"

"Think so."

"What's happening to her? What's happening to my wife?" he demands to the doctor as he stands up.

"She is bleeding," the doctor says. "We are trying to stop it."

"Why can't you stop it? What is going on?"

"She's going to be fine. You need to stay calm, Stiles," a nurse says. A doctor gives her a piercing look.

"Tell me what that means."

"She is bleeding. We don't know why but we are going to try and stop it. We need you stay calm or we have to ask you to go," the doctor says. I can't see them much anymore.

"Stiles," I whisper again.

"Lydia!" he calls out. I can still see him, still hear him. He's in pain. He shouldn't be.

"I'm okay," I say and flex my hand open so he puts his fingers back in mine.

"Stiles," I say. "Go to her."

"No. I have to stay with you."

I can see them carrying my baby out of the room. Where are they taking her? Why are they taking my baby away?

"No! You have to go to her!"

Then things are really getting blurry.

"She's bleeding too much. Get me four pints of A positive. Now," the doctor exclaims.

"Is she okay?" Stiles asks.

"Go to Ariel," I say and then everything falls black.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Ariel

Stiles

"You got to stop man," Scott says.

They are both sitting in my room, looking over my lifeless body. I haven't moved for six days. Stiles is losing hope. I know he is trying his best and that he really wants to but he has to start making arrangements in case I don't wake up. If I can't get out of this then he might have to do a lot more that I don't want him to have to do. Like figure out how he is going to live with himself. That is what he has been trying to do for a few days now. He doesn't sleep very much because the kids sleep in his bed and he has nightmares so he doesn't want to scare them.

He has dark purple circles under his eyes and his hands are unsteady. He seems to always be confused and in pain from his injuries and from not being able to sleep. I stand close to him whenever I can. Sometimes I know he can feel my presence but other times I don't think he is even thinking that I can see him.

"I know," Stiles says. "It's been six days and she hasn't gotten any better. I'm getting this really terrible feeling that says she might not ever get better."

He pauses and wipes his face off with a hand, drug across his cheeks and over his eyes.

"What if she never gets better?" he asks. "I can't handle that, Scott."

"We don't know that she won't. Just stop, okay Stiles?"

"The nurses don't talk about when she wakes up anymore. They don't say anything. They move her around so that if she does wake up her muscles won't be incapable of movement anymore but that's all they do. Nothing has changed. It's looking bleaker by the second."

"Stiles! Stop! I understand that you are scared but until you know otherwise you need to be positive. Not only for yourself but for your kids. Luke can sense how you feel and Ariel sees it. Please try to be positive for them."

"I have been trying."

"I know."

"Ariel wants to see her again," he says.

"Then let her. Do you want me to take her?"

"No. I'll do it."

Stiles gets up and turns towards the door. Scott grabs his arm and turns him around.

"It's okay, Stiles," he says. "It's okay."

He goes outside where he sees Malia standing as she watches the kids. Luke is on a matt she laid out right in front of her, crawling or walking around and then Ariel is off on the monkey bars, swinging from one to another. My husband walk over and look at her right in her eyes since he is tall enough to. She smiles so he grabs her around the waist and holds onto her tight.

"Hi baby girl!" he says.

"Daddy!"

"Do you want to go in and visit mommy?"

"Yeah! Yeah! Can Luke see her?"

"I think that you and I should go see her for now and then I am going to have Luke go in later. Sound good?"

"Okay," she says and wraps her arms around his neck as he carries her. Stiles looks over at Malia as he sets Ariel down to walk.

"Do you mind taking him for a little longer. We won't be long," he says. She puts her hand on Stiles's forearm. I can see him trying to take comfort in it. It doesn't work. I wish anything would work to help him. He is looking as sick as I am right now.

"Of course not, Stiles."

"Thank you."

When they arrive back at the hospital Aggie lets them in right away. He walks over to my body and sits in the chair where he always sits. Ariel sits on his lap and looks over at me. For several seconds they are silent. I wish I could talk to them. I wish they could hear me like I can hear them. I wish I knew how to wake up. I know he is helping me feel human. When he talks to me I don't just hear it, I feel it too. I know that I can do it. I can wake up if he keeps telling me I can. I know I can wake up if he makes me think that I can. I know I can get up for my kids.

Ariel puts her hand on my cold one and looks sad. She looks back at her father who seems lost in trying to figure out what he is going to do with his life.

"Daddy?" she asks.

"Yeah?" he asks as he looks at her with an attempt at a smile. It turns out to be sadder than he means it.

"Why is she cold?"

"Um…because the doctors want to keep her body temperature low."

"Why?"

"Doctor reasons," he decides. "It's okay. She's supposed to be that way. Don't worry about it."

She leans back in his lap and looks at me with sad eyes. I think she is realizing that I might have the power to wake up. I am trying everything I can. I am trying, I promise, Ariel. I have to get up for them but everything feels like a weight. It feels like…I'm drowning.

I remember Stiles told me one time what a panic attack feels like. He was nineteen when we were sitting on the couch and I asked him. He said, "It's like your underwater and someone has their hands on your shoulders. You try to push them off, to resurface and catch air but no matter what they are just too strong for you. You can't think about anything but panicking. You can't think about anything but the pain and the fear. Most of all the fear. It's the kind of fear that hurts in your gut. And after a while you have to let the water in. You don't have a choice so you open your mouth and let it in. It hurts at first, and then all of the sudden everything stops and it's peaceful. It's like falling asleep because that's what you're doing. And that's when I pass out."

He pauses and looks up at me, playing with something in his fingers as he always does.

"Or?" I ask.

He looks confused for a second and then seems to remember something and smiles.

"Or someone that's really important to me, someone that I can see at a time like that pulls me back. It's only ever worked with three people."

"Scott?" I asked.

"Yeah and my dad and…you." He pauses and then smiles. "Thanks for asking and for caring."

"You're welcome."

We went back to studying. Now I think I get what he means. Not being able to wake up is like drowning. Someone is holding me under and I can't breathe. I want to come back up. I want to breathe. I even try everything that I can to push their hands away but nothing works. And I feel like I am getting closer to that time where either I drown or someone pulls me out. But he's right, it has to be someone that is important to me. It has to be sort of an…emotional tether.

Years ago when Deaton told me to go with Stiles because I could pull him back I knew it was true. I knew I could do it because he loved me. I also knew because we're best friends and because I care about him more than I care about myself. It was true then even if I didn't know it and it's true now. He is my emotional tether and he always will be.

Ariel stands by my motionless head and looks back at her dad. He is trying hard to be positive.

"Daddy?"

"Yes baby girl," he says as he holds my hand. I can almost feel it. I look at it more and try to feel it. I stare right at his manly fingers, the way his thumb brushes over my skin. I can almost feel it.

"Is mommy ever going to wake up?"

Stiles bites his lip as he looks at my face and then back at Ariel. He shakes his head and shrugs as if he doesn't know what is going on or how to answer.

"I don't know, Ariel," he says. "I really hope so."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

My Ariel

Lydia

"You scared me to death," Stiles whispers against my hand.

"I know," I say. "I'm sorry."

"They're sure your okay now. They said they don't know why you were bleeding but you're okay."

"Our baby? Where is she?" I demand when I don't see her. I just woke up from a strange state. I had been out for just a few hours.

"With your mom. She fed her and I made sure she was all right. She was in the room here with me and she's fine. She's right here. Do you want to hold her?"

"Yeah," I nod.

He stands up to the table thing beside me and picks her up out of it. She has red hair. She has her moms hair. He holds her carefully, looking down at her in awe before handing her over to me.

"I just set her down a minute ago. I didn't want to let her go but they just did another test."

"Test?" I ask.

"They do them on all of the newborns. She's perfectly fine."

"Oh."

He puts my baby in my arms and there is only one thing that I can think: home. She's here with me. And were all home because we are together. She is so beautiful. She has a tiny little nose and cute pink cheeks. Her eyes are wide open with that newborn blue and she has quite a layer of strawberry blonde hair on her head. She is so warm, all wrapped up in a blanket and so soft and fragile.

"She's so beautiful," I whisper through my tears.

"Yes she is mama," he agrees.

"Come sit with us," I say and move over a little notching how sore I am. He notices my wince and helps me scoot over for him.

"You just had a C-section you are going to be really sore for a while," he reminds me.

"Right."

He sits right beside me so that our sides are touching as I hold our daughter. He puts his hand over her body and his other one around my shoulders supporting me because I really don't have much muscle left at all from the surgery.

"Where is my mom now?" I ask.

"She went downstairs to tell everyone when you were waking up. She said I should be here with you for a few minutes alone."

"Everyone?" I ask.

"Everyone came to see you and Ariel. Scott, Malia, Kira, Liam, Hayden, my dad, −"

"Ariel?"

"You called her Ariel. When you told me to follow her right before you passed out you called her Ariel. I followed her and then I was with her for a while before they told me they got the bleeding under control and that you were in recovery and should wake up on your own time. If you don't like the name we don't have to use it."

"No." I shake my head. "I love it. A lot. Do you like it?"

"I think it's perfect," he agrees. "What about her middle name?"

"I was thinking about that too. I know we thought about names some but we decided not to pick anything. We mentioned this one and if you don't like it or if it makes you sad than we don't have to use it. I never knew her but I saw her and she was such a beautiful women. And she was so kind and a great mother and wife."

His face pulls together as he realizes what I am talking about. I don't want to bring it up if it will make him upset though.

"She would have been so proud of you. She would have loved her granddaughter. She does love her granddaughter and she is proud of you just like Allison is. So I think her name should be Ariel Claudia Stilinski," I finish.

He smiles and brushes his hand over his left eye before he leans in and kisses me. I pull his lips close to mine, wanting him to stay here with us forever.

"I love it," he says when he pulls away. I hear someone outside of the door.

"Well good because I think we are going to have to tell them that too," I joke.

There is a knock on the door and then it opens. Stiles stands up, helping me sit up with a pillow before walking over to hug Scott. He hugs him first and then Malia after. They walk over to see me and the baby when I see Stiles hug his father in pure love and joy. He walks back over and sits by the side of the bed so that he can be close to the both of us.

"Stiles you are going to be a wonderful father," Scott says.

"Thanks man," Stiles says, patting him on the shoulder.

"So is her name Leia?"

"We are not naming our daughter Leia," I chime in, throwing a hand up with a slightly pulled in expression.

"That's okay we'll just name our son Luke."

"We are not naming our son Luke, Stiles," I assure him.

"Luke is a pretty normal name," Scott says.

"Want to have another one already?" Kira asks.

"Oh," I say, shaking my head. She is right. Why are we even talking about that right now? "No. She's right."

"We are definitely going to name our son Luke," Stiles says.

"One day if we have a son we will discuss names for him and one of those options will not be Luke."

"Of course, whatever you say beautiful," he agrees with his hands up and then looks over and whispers something in Scott's ear.

"It's definitely an option. It'll grow on her."

"Like moss grows on a rock," Kira mumbles.

"I am a banshee…and you're not quiet. I heard that."

My mom walks over and puts her hand on my shoulder as she looks down at my baby. I can't stop looking at her either. She is so beautiful. She is so…mine and that is the really wonderful part. She is so pure, nothing can touch her yet. She doesn't know anything but the smells of her mother and father. She doesn't know anything but her instincts and that is incredible and makes me feel so special in this world.

"So does this beautiful baby have a name?" Sheriff asks.

"Yeah we just decided. Haven't even filled out the paperwork yet," I say and look over to my husband.

"Her name is Ariel. Ariel Claudia Stilinski."

His father looks at him in awe before putting his hand on his shoulder and looking down at his granddaughter.

"Your mother would be so proud, Stiles," he says thickly.

"Thanks pops."

There is a long pause and I smile before asking,

"So who wants to hold the baby first?"


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

 **Screaming**

 **Lydia**

I can't watch him do this anymore. I can feel everything he feels now. It's excruciating. He can't survive much longer. He needs me to either stay or go so that he can move on with his life. He can't have this constant not knowing what is going to happen. He has to go back home with the kids. He has to go back to work and go back to our friends. He has to go back to living his life and I can't stop him anymore.

He is sitting over my bed, holding my hand with trembling fingers as he tries to convince me to wake up. He sat in silence for a while. It's the seventh night. It's midnight. The kids are back home. My mom agreed to stay the night there and take care of them. Stiles told her he wouldn't be staying very many more nights. He can feel my drifting away. I know he can because I can feel it too. I try to tell myself that it's okay. I have to learn to let go for him, for my kids. Dragging this out is only going to make things more difficult for everyone. If it's over no matter if I live or die then this part is over. The waiting will be gone. The anxiety that I am giving my already anxiety-filled-husband will be gone too. He's had at least two panic attack's every other day, sometimes more. This is not good for his mental health.

He sits, holding my hand with a sad look on his face. His lip trembles and he wipes his mouth with his hand as if to stop it. Tears fall from his face onto our intertwined hands. He traces his free hand on my forearm, making patterns as he starts to speak.

"I know we don't really talk about it but I've been thinking about when I was the nogitsune lately. For a while I didn't really understand why it kept coming up in my mind. It has been years since I have been that evil thing. Of course, as you know, I still get nightmares from it. I know who I killed. I know that because of me you will never get your best friend back or your lover. I know that I took those two people away from you even if it was slightly indirectly. You convinced me when we got married that none of that was really my fault. I see where you were going with that. But I can still remember liking it.

"This is going to sound terrible but the best feeling I got the entire time was when I stabbed Scott. He was scared, terrified even. He was filled with anxiety and terror and hate. He wanted to be with the real Stiles, he wanted to save his friends and he was determined in a way that made me hungry. I remember feeling what he felt. I remember taking it. And the worst thing about all of that is I remember how much I loved it. His anger, hurt and pain made me feel so power hungry. It made me feel so…good and powerful and…unstoppable. When I was the Nogitsune I felt unstoppable and irrepressible. It was like I could do whatever I wanted and get whatever painful hate out of people that I loved. They couldn't do anything about it. Suddenly I was in control of everything. Not just my own life, but other lives too. The starving, empty feeling that I got before I didn't have any of that was terrible. It hurt in a way that made me want to satisfy it even more."

He smiles a little bit.

"Kind of like sex," he says and then brushes his thumb over my hand, looking at my face. "Which I am missing with you, by the way. In case that is, like, an incentive to wake up or something."

He chuckles and then goes back to his story.

"Anyway when I finally got all of that strife I felt so in control and just…good about everything. Afterwards I remembered what it felt like but I remembered the looks on their faces. Of course I didn't really want to hurt him but I remember liking it. And I will forever blame myself for that…for a lot of things. When I killed Donavan I didn't tell anyone because I was ashamed. I was afraid of myself. I was afraid that I was becoming the thing that we all tried so hard for me to get away from. I thought that I would never have to deal with something like that again. When I killed him I blamed myself because I wanted him dead. I can remember wanting him dead. Afterwards I didn't feel bad. I didn't feel anything but…good.

"I don't have guilt about that anymore. But at the time I did. My dad told me that I had to start by forgiving someone else. I started with Scott because he was the one that needed it the most. You were the only one that I never didn't want to talk to the entire time. I wanted to see you, out of all of our friends that weren't talking to each other…we always were. I heard something else too. Scott said that after Liam tried to kill him Liam said he couldn't just apologize he had to do something great for Scott. Something like saving his life. I've never felt like the hero. I have never been able to do all of the things that they have done.

"I was a hero when I saved you. When you looked at me after you work up from escaping Eichen and you said I saved you I felt like a real hero. I felt like that part of me that I lost when I took a life came back just a little bit. But it still came back." He smiles.

"I heard Scott say that out of everyone and everything that happens we always stick together and we make it out. Scott's right, we are pretty good together. We always make it out. Always. So Lydia Stilinski, you have to make it out of this. I was prepared to come in here and tell you that if you want to you can go but I can't do that. You might try to do it if it were me and I hope that you wouldn't because that would be giving up. And after all, we have never ever given up on each other. Even when it looked like both of us were going to die, we never cared. We would rather die than be without each other. So you have to wake up."

His lip trembles again.

I start to feel this pain in my gut. I can hear screams. I can hear hate and something else that is kind of strange…power. I can actually feel physical power as if I am gaining it through his touch. He doesn't let go as he kisses my hand.

"Lydia wake up," he says suddenly.

It is kind of harsh but straight to the point. He knows that what he is saying is make it our break it time. We don't have time for anything else. I have to do something. Anything. I just have to end this waiting. At some point someone has to make a decision and it looks like it is going to be the people that always do it. Stiles and me.

There is a loud, solid beeping sound. I don't know what it is. I can't tell. He doesn't seem to hear it.

I hear something else. The sound of sobbing. Oh no. I know who it is. Stiles. He isn't crying yet so what is it from? What happened?

More power starts to run through me. I see Stiles tell me to wake up. I see him as a teenager again. He collapses on the ground in between two walls.

"Lydia…I can't….I c-can't," he had said. He fell just then and passed out, shivering and in great pain. I touch his shoulder, sitting right with him. Moments later I feel a terrible sensation of pain. It is all I can feel. A great force seems to rip something from my heart and doesn't give it back. As it is taken away it shreds through my chest with spikes, tearing at my flesh as it leaves my body. And then I am left, bleeding to death. All I can smell is blood, metallic rusk and terror.

"Lydia you have to wake up," he says again.

His face is serious.

I hear that beeping noise again. It's solid as if something has stopped. But what? He still doesn't hear it.

I see Stiles dancing with me at the formal when were just in high school. His face was close to my hair, my cheek brushing his shoulder. I felt right in his unsteady arms. I flash to moments of our first dance at our wedding. I am wearing a long white dress, my veil draped behind my red head and he has his arms around me, pulling me as close as he can. He kisses my neck or cheek occasionally but keeps whispering something in my ear. All I can do is smile every time I hear it.

"I told you," he said the first time and I looked back at his perfect, sparkling eyes. His eyes always seem to sparkle when they look at me. He looks so…in love.

"What?" I ask.

"I told you once that two people who no one ever thought would be together…ever would end up being the perfect combination. Well I told you so."

I laugh, feeling him chuckles against my chest too and then rest my head on his shoulder for the rest of our dance.

I remember waking up with his arm around me, our legs pressed together, his heartbeat thudding on my back. I can remember hearing him breath against my hear and feeling so…safe. I want to feel that safe again one day. His heartbeat was always so perfect and slow as soon as we woke up. His breath never tasted good, but it was alway just so _him_ that I never cared. I still don't.

He would lean over my naked body and kiss my ear as we woke up. He would pull me over to face him so that he could kiss my lips a few times and then pull me in so we could hold each other before the day had to start and things had to get complicated. That was peace.

"Wake up," he says. His face is becoming angry now. I can feel it too. I should be able to do something. I have to. Just like what Meredith taught me. She told me to use my hands. She told me to use the power of my voice as much as I can. It is my voice after all. I killed Verlac and I managed to not kill Stiles.

"You can do this," he starts to say. There are tears on his face now. He knows this is it. He can feel the power just as I can. I feel like I want to sprint until my lungs can't handle it anymore, until my legs trip underneath of me, making me fall to the ground. I want to punch something over and over again until it is just dust under my feet. I want to feel strong and in control.

"You can do this! Lydia! Wake up!" he shouts now, right over top of me. He touches my face with a trembling hand as he speaks.

"Come on! Come one!"

I have to do something. I have to do something.

The air in my lungs is getting heavier. I focus all of my energy on what I want to happen, what needs to happen to get everyone out of this situation. I don't know how to control it one way or another but either way I will get them out of this. Either way it will end.

"Lydia! Come on!" he shouts and then his trembling hands stop moving, I can almost hear his heartbeat in the room. It's so fast and loud. Sobs rack his chest as he tries to hold them back.

I breath in and let out the loudest scream I have ever felt in my life. The amount of power and control and complete energy that seethes through my body in that exact moment is insurmountable and above all…it's insatiable. It doesn't stop, it wants more. It feeds off of the control and gains more and more of it. It pushes through every bad thing, every good thing, every almost okay or never to be okay at all thing in everyone's life until it thinks it might not be hungry anymore.

Then it stops and there is almost silence.

The sobs have stopped. His face looks shaken and his hands shake to touch my face.

"L-lydia?"

I feel a sensation of something being…put back in my body that has been missing for a long time. A sensation of home and presence and something normal that I enjoy. I feel like I am breathing with my own lungs again, making my own fingers move. I know I can feel his touch now. It is not just a thought. I can actually feel it. I can actually feel his fingers brush my chin and jaw line. I can feel one of his fingers twirl in my hair like he always does with his right hand. I feel like my face might even be moving into a smile, I know that is what I am thinking.

His chest is right above mine, part of his weight is on me as his face rests just inches from mine. So why can't I open my eyes? Why can't I see him? What is going on? Did I wake up? Or am I leaving my own body? Then I get the answer.

The solid beeping.

It's my heart monitor going off because my heart has stopped.

"No! No! Lydia! Come on! Please! Please!" he sobs with a terrible broken heart. I know because I can feel my heart broken in my own chest and that means that I can feel something. I can feel his touch, feel my own emotions. I can't see anything. I can't see my own body lying on the ground.

"Lydia," he says with sincerity and a controlled voice. "I had a fifteen year plan. And I saved you."

I don't know why but I can feel my eyelids now.

Then the heart monitor starts beeping again.

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

My heart is beating. I can feel my chest to breath. Allison. Aiden. They are going to have to wait. I need to raise my babies. I need to make love to my husband. I need to go out with my friends. I need to spend time with my parents. I need to wake up.

When I open my eyes the love of my life is the first thing I see just as I hope he will be everyday when I open my eyes for the rest of my life.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Thirteen

My Kids

Stiles

"We could name him Darren," I offer. I feel Stiles shake his head as he kisses my hair. He loops his fingers in my hair, twirling it around as we talk. I play with the hair on his chest and then down towards his bellybutton. He lifts his hips and I giggle.

"Sorry," I murmur and he laughs too.

"What about Andrew?" he says.

"That's nerdy."

"But it's cute."

"But what if he's not a nerd?" I ask.

"Andrew doesn't have to be a nerd."

"No. I don't love it enough."

"Okay," he says and then seems to be thinking for a long moment. We have been thinking about names for our little boy for a while. Well now I am eight months pregnant and I think we should start thinking more seriously. We don't want to name him before we see him unless there is a name that is perfect but we haven't come up with anything that is perfect.

"Maybe when we see him we'll think of something," he offers.

"Do you want to name him after anyone like we did with Ariel?"

"Well her first name was natural but her middle name was more difficult. I think when we decided to name her after my mom it was…"

"Normal?" I ask.

"Yeah," he sighs.

"What about your name?"

He leans over so that he can see my face. I sit up and look back at him with the covers only covering up to my waist. He looks a little bit shocked for a second.

"What name?"

"Your first name. It was a family name and maybe he could be a junior," I say.

"If I hate the name why do you think he is going to like it?"

"Why do you hate it?"

"Because it's weird!"

"What about Stiles?"

He doesn't respond.

"It's a cool name."

"Why don't we just find another cool name and give it to him?"

"Like what?"

"Anchor," he offers.

"I like that but maybe not as a first name."

So we waited. Now laying back, holding my perfect, small baby in my arms he still doesn't have a name. He has dark hair like his daddy and brown eyes like the both of us. He is so sweet and little. He is a quiet baby so far but he has only been out in the real world for a little less than 24 hours. His eyes are closed, his body is warm and soft against mine as I hold him asleep.

Stiles sits next to me, playing with his feet and smiling at how he moves so softly and quietly.

"Luke," Stiles whispers.

I smile and nod.

"Luke," I agree.

His face turns into question and his eyes get wide as he leans back. He looks to the baby and then to me.

"Really?" he asks.

"Of course," I agree. "He looks like a Luke."

"Luke Anchor Stilinski?"

"I love it."

So those few years ago when I promised him Luke would ever be on my radar when it came to names…I was wrong. Just like when I promised myself years ago that I would never be with Stiles or even acknowledge that he liked me. Well I was wrong. He proves me wrong time and time again. He is always right. He knew we were going to be together. He knew we loved each other before I admitted it to myself and he was right. I did love him and I still do. I will always love him.

"So you know when I said you were wrong all those times before?" I ask him. He nods with a small smile.

"Well you were right. Every time," I tell him.

He smiles with pure love in his eyes and leans close so he can kiss me. I kiss him back and then we both look down at our baby…at our baby Luke.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

 **Wake Up**

 **Lydia**

"Oh my god!" he shouts and wraps his arms around me. He lays his head on my chest and listens to the sound of my heartbeat as tears fall onto my gown. I have tears on my own cheeks. I am able to move my hand to touch his hair. My mouth tastes terrible. There is no longer a tube down my throat but it is very difficult to make any noise at all.

Something seems to fall on me like a tremendous amount of pressure. But it's good pressure. The kind that I feel when Stiles shudders above me and I hold him as he collapses. It's the kind of pressure I felt right before we met both of our children. Or right before I said, "I do." It's the kind that makes me come back for more. I allow it. I hold onto him as tight as I can. It's not as tight as I want to. I want him closer. I need him closer.

He digs his face in my shoulder as I feel his pressure on my chest just as he collapses on me but with two layers of clothes separating us. He buries his face in my hair as I feel his tears run down my neck. My hands find his dark hair and they stay there, holding onto him as much as I can. One of my hands drags up and down his back with my mouth on his forehead.

"Lydia," he whispers over and over. "Lydia."

He smells like he hasn't showered in two days. He smells like he has been afraid for a long time. He also smells a little bit like mint and something earthy. He smells so much like my husband, just a little dirtier. I kiss his forehead, dragging my lips across his skin. He leans his face to meet mine. He looks into my eyes for a long second. I watch the recognition cross his face. He can see me again. He can see my eyes again. He touches the side of my face and kisses my forehead. I let the feeling of his lips make me shudder all over and keep my arms wrapped around his back and shoulders.

I pull the oxygen mask off of my face. He tries to shake his head but I pull it off anyway, assuring him it's okay. I can breathe again. I can feel the oxygen going into my lungs. I can feel my chest expanding and releasing every few seconds. I can feel it all and it's wonderful. I am really here with him. And I am awake.

"St-iles," I croak. My voice doesn't sound like my own. It's raspy and very quiet but it is all I can manage. He smiles and shakes his head, trying to get me not to say anything.

"Lydia, don't speak. It's okay," he says.

I shake my head. "Kiss me."

He nods with my eyes reflected in his tears and leans down. He captures my lips in his for several seconds. We kiss long and passionately and gently. He holds me softly and makes sure that his lips can taste mine. His beauty is like nothing else. I can feel him trembling as I hold him. His entire back shuddering and his hands that are on my face are unsteady not as they normally are when he holds me.

"Lydia," he says as he pulls away.

"Y-you're shaking," I say.

"I was scared. I'm not scared anymore."

I smile as I lean up to make him kiss me again. This time he slips his tongue in my mouth and he tastes like mint. I let him hold me there for several seconds as our mouths move together in unison. They work perfectly and I don't want him to pull away. It is becoming harder to take a deep breath. He releases me and I breath with a smile on my face. He smiles too and it is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen in my life. I touch his cheek and he wipes the tears from my face.

"You're okay," he says. "You're awake and you're gonna be okay."

"Are you?"

"I am now," he promises. "I am now."

He brushes my hair with his fingers for several seconds. He sits up on the edge of my bed when I grab his shirt and pull him back down. He catches himself with his hands on either side of me and kisses my lips again. I don't want him to leave. Then suddenly I want to see my babies. I really want to see them.

"Stiles," I whisper.

"Yeah?" he asks as he sits up, not far from my face.

"The kids." I sound like I smoke three packs a day at least. I try to make it sound better, swallow a few times.

"They're here. They were worried about you."

"I know. I saw."

He smiles. "Of course you did."

Another tear falls down his face so I reach up and wipe it away. He smiles into my hand.

"Home," I whisper.

"I'll take you home soon Lydia," he says. "I'm just glad you're awake."

I nod in agreement. I want to see the kids. I feel my body desperate for them. I need to hold Luke again. I need to feel Ariel's arms around me again. Stiles kisses my hand as he sits with me. His smile says everything he wants to say but doesn't know how.

"I knew you could hear me," he says. "I knew you were listening."

"I love you," I say and because he's Stiles: the man I married, the father of my children, the man I am in love with he replies, "I know."


	20. NEW PUBLISHED BOOK

**Hello Everyone! I have just recently published my fourth book. If you like young adult fiction about teens trying to get through life, you will like my book, "My Socially Awkward Friends and I". It is about a group of people who are just trying to get through high school with some serious and mild problems of their own.**

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 **Copy and paste the link to find it!**

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 **Can be purchased INTERNATIONALLY! If you would like a signed copy, let me know. Message me and we can work out details if you're having trouble finding it or if you want to get one from me.**

 **Thank you all for reading my stories and following! If you like my fanfiction style, you will probably like my book. I appreciate your support! I really appreciate the ones who have reviewed too!**

 **If you want to read young adult action based on fictional terrorist acts, please check out my other three books (series of three that is now complete): The Fight, The Battle and The War. You can look these up on amazon or find them under my name on amazon. Message me for me details.**

 **Anyway…read on!**


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